May 21, 2005
IPC Entertainment presents: Operation Fandoq 1

Dear Viewers:
Now we shall take over the control of your monitors!
We shall control the verticals, the horizontals, & even the diagnals!
We shall control the left, the right and in between or the middle (Khate Imam)!
Now, we are in control of your monitors!
Now, you are entering the "Ahreemanic Zone"!
Sit back, relax, grab a can of your favorite beverage and get ready to enter the,
Doo doo, doo doo, doo doo, doo doo, Da dada daaaaaaaaaaaaaa.............
The Ahreemanic Zone!

Welcome To The Ahreemanic Zone........
Folks,
This one is my special tribute to All Iranian Garage Based Satellite Television Movements, their TV Showmen and their followers! Bon Appetite!
Announcement
Operation Fandoq 1


Dear Aryan Youth of Iran, return to your Zoroastrian Roots and avoid Pure Islam of Muhammedi! Avoid Imam Memei & return to Dr. Fandoqe Fandoqist!
A Bit History
Before we start the interview,
Primarily allow me to preach to you that The Fandoqist Movement is rather different than any other present Television Movement! On this day, we have various Television Movements in exile. The original Radio/Television Movement Showman was our legendary Orson Welles with his legendary "War of The Worlds" Show. People actually fell for his show & believed that Aliens were invading The Earth! After our Father, Orson Welles, we have learned the power of TV Shows, Infomercials, & TV Connery!
Next came our various Iranian TV Movements trying to copy the legendary Orson Welles, yet there were three problems:
a) Our Cheese-Ball showmen & Con Artists, were not as convincing as Mr. Welles!
b) Our Facilities were not major studios, yet the Garages & Basements of our TV Owners' rental homes, a camcorder & an Iranian Editor named Ani (short for Enayat)!
c) Our Showmen were not as conning as Mr. Welles, yet they had various experience in the fields of Car Sales, Rug Sales and Insurance Sales; therefore, they try making up for this major lack.
Finally our beloved Iranian community's geniuses started to erect famous cheesy Iranian Talk Shows, yet named them Iranian 24 hours TVs! These shows could easily be conducted on radio, yet the Showmen insisted to show their gorgeous faces on TVs! They run their talks with audience, ads, a few cheesy music videos for 12 hours & then run the whole damn thing again for another 12 hours & they call it 24 hours Television. Iranian Entertainment @ its best!
Next thing you know, the new rising stars of Iranian Pop Music (Two Bit Persian Whores of LA), including Miss Faheshe, and also Old Legendary Shah Qalis of Iranian Pop Music (Veteran Persian Whores, just arrived in LA), including Ms. Mamoosh, had joined these TV Show Movements to aid the good "Compatriots" of Eye-Rain & Up_Position in their Erections, also Raising & Waving their Hero's pictures & Banners! These Great Iranian Artists were also helping these movements via singing Ey Iran, Ey Iran songs in this manner:

Ey Miran, Ey Razl-e Por Goh Arrr,
Dar Saye at, parvaride Gav O Khar,
Mollah shod, tamame khake Ariya,
Ma dast bar tokhm, dar Qorbat O safa!
La La La LaLa, LaLa, LaLa ............
Or sometimes these Honar Bandan of LA, sing:
Cho Miran Lavashak,
Kabob Kubideh Mabad!
Be din Chelo Kaboby,
Zende Yek tan mabad .........
But their favorite patriotic song, often heard on LA TVs is this one:
Cho Iran nabashad,
Be Tokhmam ke nist!
Ravam jaye digar,
Zamin qaht nist!
Next thing you know, Home Sick, Hopeless, Gullible, Retired, Allaf, & Activist Youth, bought these Garage-Visions programs & purchased the full line of coffee Mugs, Cups, Water bottles, Caps, Aprons, T.Shirts, Bibs, Diapers and condoms!
Each TV Showman insisted that Faravahar is the logo for their show! Each wanted the monopoly on Faravahar! We even produced Faravahar condoms & Strawberry Lube Oil! Presently we are in the progress to produce Green, White & Red Underwears for the patriotic folks!
Soon, many Legendary movements came out! amongst them, are:


The Yazidi Movement
The Iran of Yesterday Movement
The 9/11 Iran Movement
The 411 Information Iran Movement
The Iran of Day After Tomorrow Movement
The Nagoo-Zia Movement
The Pink Faravahar Movement
The Anojaman-e Farmayeshi Movement
The Orange Derafsh Movement
and of course,
Our beloved,
"Fandoqist Movement"
* * *
Interview with Dr. Fandoqist


Today we have the pleasure to conduct an interview with Dr. Fandoqe Fandoqist, the spiritual leader and the commander in chief of global Gang of Fandoqists under the Orange Derafsh!




Raise & Wave Dr. Fandoqe Fandoqist's (my own) Posters, because:
a) To put the viewer in doubt about who will be the future Sultan! Will it be Shah Sultan Hussein or will it be Shah Sultan Fandoq?!
b) To distance ourselves from Shah Sultan Hussein, so people will not assume that we are another Shahollahi flag waving, poster raising Disco Movement!
c) We had to give our Nuts something to raise & wave! How can we send them in the streets without anything in their hands to raise & wave? Iranians must wave something, may it be Mosadeq, Shah, Imam Khomeini, President Khayami (Testicles), Meme Rajavi or Shah Seyed Sultan Hussein-e Dovom's pictures! So we figured to give the Hazelnuts, pictures of Dr. Fandoqe Fandoqist's posters to wave!




By raising Fandoq Derafsh
By waving Dr. Fandoq's Posters
By throwing Chaining, chain Banging and Chest Banging sessions @ Government & Federal Building's front side walks!
and of course by wearing Faravahar Fandoqist Caps!
Well we figured, even if we will not be able to destroy Islam, we can @ least sell some merchandise, caps & mugs, TV ads & collect some funds to develope the Fandoq!
If Ayatollah Rafsanjani can develop Pistachio in Pistachio Farms, why can't we develop Fandoq in London or New York? Who is to stop us? We slap the western governments & police forces in the face!








We use Anti Islam Atmosphere to do some business, get popular, have some fun, cut & paste other historians knowledge in to our shows & pretend its our own, gather some Allaf as scattered gangs o bums around Europe and of course claim that we have an Internal Operation & Army of Fandoqs, ready to take Operation Fandoq, onto a step further to cripple IRI.




You are only allowed to hold 1 Fandoq between your fingers & take it to demonstrations!


Now how can we possibly hold 2 Fandoqs in our hands? For Ahura Yazidi's sake, that means cooperation with other groups! We are not about 2 hands or 2 Fandoqs, but we are about 1 hand & 1 Fandoq! We are the righteous ones! Javid Fandoq!










a) We will not destroy our pacifist stands by using real guns & knives!
b) We obey the law, because blades under 4 inches which are not switch blades, are perfectly legal.


Bad Bad Bad Pasebans! Join the Fandoqists & turn on Mullahs!




.............. Operation Walnut 1. This huge Operation Walnut 1 or Operation Gerdu 1, will be the final blow in the face of IRI! We are planing to purchase pounds & pounds of Walnuts from Haji in Westwood & transfer them to Tehran, for our Internal Army to hold them hi in the face of the Islamist Police! Only then, you are allowed to hold Walnuts with your fingers, & even then, you must, I insist that you must only hold up & rise only & only One Walnut! Not two!






Javid Fandoq
Javid Fandoqism
Javid Me, Dr. Fandoqe Fandoqist
Javid Shah Seyed Sultan Hussein-e Dovom
Javid Shaf and Shaf-e Miran
* * *

Now we return the control of your monitors back to yous!
Go on, shoo, shoo fly, shoo away...............
Go back to your lives & jobs & ................
What? What did you say? You got no jobs?
Well, some of you with jobs, go back to work,
Some of you with no jobs, continue vegetation or play "Ye Qol - Do Qol" with the one next to yous!
Ahreeman Bless!
Amen!
Who loves you babies?
Ahreeman indeed!
Who else?
Sign,

Ahreeman Mirzaye Qajar