Iran Politics Club      
RP II vs. Castro!
Website For Thinking Iranians
Back to index   Reza Pahlavi II vs. Fidel Castro!  

Reza Pahlavi II versus Fidel Castro!
A Comparison and a Case Study
Ahreeman X
1st Edition: February 1, 2007 = 2565 Shahanshahi PIY (Persian Imperial Year)

2nd Edition: November 27, 2016 = 2575 Shahanshahi PIY (Persian Imperial Tear)

Fidel made History,
Reza aged by History!

A New 2016 Note:

Before you start reading this piece, you shall read this updated note:

Hello Kiddies, gather around Papa Ahreeman around the fire place for yet another juicy Ahreemanic story! Ready? Set? Let’s roll ……

So what’s new since 2007 when I first wrote this piece?

Fidel Castro departed and like it or not, he was a global icon. Depending on who you speak to, Castro was a wide range of characters from a super hero all the way to a dictator and a criminal. Still, he departed this world and left his mark as a global icon.

Castro has just passed away and this gave me an opportunity to republish this wonderful piece! Of course many things have changed since I first wrote this piece in 2007. For instance Castro resigned from his post as the president and appointed Raul his brother as the president, also Hussein Obama (first Muslim American president) opened up the relations with Cuba without gaining anything back for USA (that pissed off the Cuban Americans). Also Reza Pahlavi has aged more and accomplished less! Reza Pahlavi has become more silent and made a deal with IRI to end any constructive political activity (not that he done much in the past) in returns for a great amount of money (IRI blood money); however, he was granted permission by IRI to only talk but no action (more or less like before)! In the future I will write a vast article on how Reza Pahlavi sold the Iranian Opposition to IRI for a large amount of dollars and finally destroyed and ended the Iranian monarchy and the monarchist movement (stay tuned).

In addition, Hussein Obama betrayed the Iranian opposition the same as the Cuban opposition by once (1st time) flirting with the Mullahs instead of backing the 2009 Iranian Opposition Uprising (so the uprising failed), and by second (2nd time) making a nuclear deal with the Mullahs in 2015 and handing 1.7 billion dollars to the Mullahs and agree to pay the rest of the 150 billion dollars (Iranian frozen assets) to IRI. Have in mind that this 150 billion dollars were not the IRI money but the Imperial Iranian Regime’s money which belongs to the Iranian people and not the Terrorist Mullah Regime of IRI. Obama needed to and needs to pay this money to the Iranian Opposition to overthrow IRI rather than paying it to the IRI to establish the Mullahs Terrorist Regime in Iran!

But then again, it is not a perfect world! Castro a working class hero died as a ruthless dictator, Reza Pahlavi as a non working class (never worked a day in his life) Career Exilist is still a “Zero”, and Hussein Obama the Muslim Marxist president of America (by Shari’a Law he is a Muslim because his father and Grandfather were Muslim) has ruled America for 8 bloody years with his Socialist Regime and frankly destroyed America and the Globe! The good news is that Donald Trump will become the new US president in 2017 to save whatever has left of America and to make America great again! So as the results, since 2007:

Fidel Castro is now a Dead Marxist Dictator
Reza Pahlavi is now still a Loser yet on IRI’s payroll
Hussein Obama had Shiited all over USA and the Globe

But on the bright side we have won the Trump National Populist Revolution and now we will “Drain the Swamp” in DC, yet primarily Trump has to disinfect the White House from the Obamic Odors! Them odors are deadly!

And now for the rest of the story ……

Fidel Castro the Icon – The Castro Look!


Now before we start, I need to clarify that I am neither a Marxist nor a Monarchist. Actually I believe that both groups live in LaLa Land! Marxists live in 1980s and Monarchists live in 1880s! Both groups worship Dead Ideologies and both groups have fanatical dogmatic fixations towards their belief system! So even though both Marxists and Monarchists have a lot in common with each other, yet I have nothing in common with either one. Even though I mock both groups, yet I have to admit that we have some devoted and dedicated Iranian Marxist and Monarchist Opposition members which I had and have the pleasure of working with them.

However the issue here is not about Marxism versus Monarchism, but the issue here is about character study. It is about a case study and a comparison between two persons, a person of powerful will who took charge and control of his nation's destiny (Fidel Castro) and a person of no will and much indecision who sold the prosperity of his nation to a comfortable life in exile (Reza Phalavi II). We are presenting historical facts in a form of humor to compare these two characters,

An International Hero, Fidel Castro
An Iranian Zero, Reza Pahlavi II

Right here and right now, I proudly confess that I am a Revolutionary; therefore, I admire Revolutionaries and Men with Balls of Steel from any ideology and all walks of life! What I really despise, are useless, mellow jello indecision bums with Cotton Balls and with no purpose in life!

So for those ignorant to global history, please sit down, relax and allow me to take control of your monitor and enlighten you to real history in a form of satire. Let's roll,

L. Reza Pahlavi and El Khayeh Malha (Testicle Polishers)
R. Fidel Castro and El Che Guevara (Man of Steel)

Why don't we analyze some historical facts?
Why don't we get a political conclusion from this analysis?
Shall we cruise through the history?
Let's do a historical comparison, shall we?

Reza Pahlavi II vs. Fidel Castro!

When Castro got kicked out of Cuba, he spent all of his rich family's fortune and money to buy guns and weapons, then he gathered as many fighting men as he could and as many great advisors and Militants such as El Che. Eventually he invaded Cuba and took over Cuba by creating a Revolution. You can call it a Coup, a Revolution or a Take over, but for sure Castro did not waste time Fandangoing around for 38 + years!

Our beloved Reza Junior, which I also have some sympathy for him and of course some agreements with him, was another story! Our he-row was more into the easy life in exile than to coup de tat!

Castro read philosophy in his teens,
Reza played with his pet mouse in his teens!

Castro has a Ph.D. and is a doctor,
Reza is a college drop out in a factor!

Castro has become amongst the Doctors,
Reza is still measuring Factors!

Castro is an educated man of college and streets,
Reza is a failed man in education and the streets!

Castro was a rich boy who sacrificed all his money and family's money to save his nation,
Reza was an economically challenged boy who lost his ass in the stock market!

Castro went full time in Jungle to make Revolution,
Reza went full time in bedroom to make babies in hope of making a son!

Castro is a Warrior Rebel who marked his name in history,
Reza is a Pacifist, Passive, Indecision, Weak of a Flop who went way down in the bottom of the history!

Castro sacrificed everything to overthrow Batista's Dictatorship,
Reza sacrificed Iran and Iranians to attend to his belly in the kitchen!

Castro took initiation and decision in his own hands,
Reza looks for permission from Washington DC and in Senators' hands!

Castro created the capital, starting with his own money,
Reza looks for a hand out from CIA in Langley!

Castro had Revolutionaries around him with Balls of Steel like El Che Guevara,
Reza has Ball Less, Old Taryaki, Opium Addicts around him like El Khaye Malha!

Castro went to Jungle for years to build the future of Cuba,
Reza went to hiding, ball and games for decades to build his soft life!

Castro had left the Luxury and Easy Life and went to Jungle to build an army,
Reza done nothing but the easy life to build his Ego in Capri!

Castro went into jungle for years to build the rebel revolutionary militia machine,
Reza went into Disco to do ninash nash with Nasrin!

Castro is a charismatic, blood-boiling speaker,
Reza's speech makes a cold-blooded reptile to become a freezer!

Castro trained rebels,
Reza trained himself as a chef in the kitchen!

Castro is Man O Destiny,
Reza is Man O Pantry!

Castro ate Rats in the jungle,
Reza ate Pastry by the double!

Castro ate tree leaves in the jungle,
Reza ate Polo Chelo in the kitchen!

Castro gathered an army,
Reza expanded his belly and hiney!

Castro lost weight in the jungle,
Reza gained weight in the kitchen!

Castro done the best with very little that he had,
Reza done the worst with so much that he had!

Castro used economy for his success,
Reza failed in economy and in stock market with disgrace!

Castro gathered fighters like Che,
Reza gathered leeches like the Kiss Asses around him who eventually bad invested and sucked off all his money and made him broke!

Castro spent all his family's money on cannons and Machine Guns,
Reza begged money from King of Saudi and Kissed Arab's Ass and Al Shahvans!

Castro spent all his and his family's money on Revolution,
Reza once lost everything due to stupidity and begged money from Monarchs around the world for his own reconstitutions!

Castro put money into the cause to build a nation,
Reza took money out of Iranians' mouths to live a luxurious life, not to mention!

Castro sacrificed everything in his possession for Cuba,
Reza sacrificed Iran for his life of comfort in Genoa!

Castro got back to politics because he was a natural politician,
Reza got back into politics because he made a deal with rich Persians and his family to support him financially, so in returns he would become an activist!

Castro got back to politics for the cause,
Reza got back to politics for money!

Castro invaded Cuba by his army,
Reza invaded Kitchen by his recipes!

Castro freed Cuba by revolution,
Reza wrote a couple of books (supposedly by himself!) on how to slap IRI on the hand with harsh words of referendum!

Castro took over Cuba and ruled for decades,
Reza took over the Kitchen and he is still cooking great gourmet food for decades!

Castro danced a victory mambo dance,
Reza danced mambo in every chance!

Castro shaken the whole world by his steel balls,
Reza is shaking the microphones of FOX, MSNBC, CNN, and others by his talks!

Castro has been compared to Napoleon and Nader Shah,
Reza has been compared to Louis de 16th and Ahmad Shah!

Castro regularly mentioned as a patriot,
Reza has regularity going to bathroom in the chariot!

Castro has marked the history,
Reza has been aged by history!

Castro spoke to heads of states,
Reza spoke to Shams Ali and Mercedes!

Castro drove a nation to independence,
Reza cooked the food in the kitchen, with much acceptance!

Castro made a decision and stood by it,
Reza listened to the fortuneteller and lived by it!

Castro has Established a Nation,
Reza accomplished Regularity in Bathroom of his Mansion!

Castro has finished his Revolution,
Reza is still in debates about future Ramification!

Castro was concerned about the future Cuban children's feelings,
Reza is concerned about Senator Rockefeller's Feelings!

Castro signs paychecks to Cuban Institute's Hostess,
Reza signs CIA paychecks to every Daguri Website and Media Homeless!

Castro lives in a humble home in Havana,
Reza lives in a Mansion in Maryland!

Castro is hard to please,
Reza eats lots of cheese!

Castro is down to earth,
Reza has an Ego and a smirk!

Castro became a global legend,
Reza became a legend in his own mind!

Castro makes history,
Reza makes nursery!

Castro makes destiny with harmony,
Reza makes babies with rhapsody!

Castro visions the future,
Reza visions the supplies in the kitchen!

Castro made Farm Plants,
Reza makes Eggplants!

Castro is Global,
Reza is Comical!

Castro can accomplish,
Reza is cartoonish!

Castro is a Nationalist,
Reza is a Gynecologist!

Castro is a known figure in world politics,
Reza is still waiting to be discovered like an up and Coming talent in logistics!

Castro sold sugar canes and bananas, he avoided luxury,
Reza sold the prosperity of Iran to his belly and underbelly!

Kennedy tried to assassinate Castro by exploding Cigars,
IRI doesn't give a rat's ass if Reza is dead or alives!

Castro made Revolution,
Reza has Constipation!

Castro made Constitution,
Reza is waiting for Inauguration!

Castro rules with determination,
Reza is in dreams of Coronation!

Castro became history,
Reza is still a Mystery!

Castro is Castro,
Reza, oh well, I better not go there!

Reality Hurts, doesn't it?

L. Opey Pahlavi - The Kitchen Chef
R. Dopey Pahlavi - The Mr. Mom

Do not get me wrong, I still dig the guy, I still dig his efforts and leave the communication open with his office. What can I say, my mouth always got me in trouble! Now Reza will be pissed at me!

Reza, you go guy, I have faith in you, one of these days you will get it right, well as long as you tried to quit being a Shah and you went for presidency, I know many Monarchists abandoned you, even wanted to skin you alive, but hey, man got to do, what the man got to do. Maybe, you finally figured out that Monarchy's chances are very slim and you are better off try your candidacy as a president! Hell, Maryam erected herself as the next president, why not you?

Any which way the wind blows, right Reza?!

And now you are back to becoming a Shah again! What a guy!

Actually, Mojahedin or Monarchists can erect as many presidents or Shahs as they want but ultimately people of Iran must decide the regime type and the head of the regime.

But one thing is for sure, the leader must have solid balls of steel and laps of logical brains and unfortunately I do not see this quality in today's opposition leaders.

L. Ernesto Che Guevara and Fidel Castro, men of steel, during a sensitive moment, making decision on an offensive.
R. El Che, Famous Revolutionary

That is why I am nominating Lori Forouzandeh as my candidate for presidency of Iran,

Lori Forouzandeh Index

.... between her sweet white milky thighs and them silky yet firm legs, she got more balls than all of these dudes and dudettes!

Hey wait a second, I did not mean it that way! No … no, I didn't mean she is a Transsexual or a Transvestite, your minds are in the gutters...... I meant she is a determined woman..........Ops it did not go well!

Any way, this is why we need to set things straight from the beginning and

Kill The Cat at The Bedroom Door.
Gorbaro Dame Hejleh Bayad Kosht.
(we got to set the rules straight, before the game) {Persian Expression and Idiom}

Oki Doki

That's the way it goes..........

I might love Maryam Rajavi, enough to sleep in the same bed with her excellency Madam president, but not enough to let her stick a dildo up my .........! Hey that didn't go well either! What's up with me today? But you know what I mean, don't you guys?

We got to always watch them Mojaheds and Monarchists, both words start with an "M"!!!

I just lovse lovse loves stirring it up!

Ain't I The Black Sheep of The Iranian Politics?!

Just humor guys,
Best wishes to all opposition with all ideologies.

More Reza Pahlavi II episodes:

Reza Pahlavi’s Rat Show

Reza Pahlavi’s Eggplant Show

Reza Pahlavi II Cartoons – Part 1

Reza Pahlavi II Cartoons – Part 2

L. Opey Pahlavi: OK I admit that I need balls this big, but I was not born with them!
R. Dopey Pahlavi: Let me count my accomplishments, let’s see: 1. I accomplished constructing a fat belly by eating too much chelo kabob, 2. I managed losing my ass in stock market and then beg Arab Sheiks and my family for money because I’m an idiot when it comes to economy, ……

El Che and El Fidel Revolutionary Brothers in Arms

El Che and El Fidel,
Couple of Revolutionaries who changed the history and became Men of Steel.

Now sleep tight,
And don't let the Turbaned Bugs bite!

Cheers from Doctor Luv


Dr. X

Back to Humor Index
Back to Cartoons Index
Back to Animation Graphics Index

Support IPC
IPC operating since March 30, 2000
          Duplication of contents are allowed, only by naming the source & link to IPC
All rights are protected & reserved by Iran Politics Club © 2000 IPC