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Iranian Elections in a Nutshell!
Iranian Elections Special


Iranian Elections in a Nutshell!
Ahreeman X
July 26, 2013

Confused Persian Baby: What the hell is this strange looking spider thingy and where
did it come from?! Now I’m getting scared, when will the spider looking thingy leaves
my flag and my country?! Hey Mom …? A little help over here please? Mom? Help?

From the desk of Ahreeman X
To all Readers, Members, Doers and Comrades,

Howdy Folks:

Allow me to simply put this grand political event in a nutshell for you.

Iranian elections are pretty much not political events, yet they are zoological events! Why you ask? Simply because a great number of animals are involved! Lost you are? Not to worry, Ahreeman is here to save you from drowning in a sea of confusion. Ready, set, let’s roll:

First of all, it is not Iranian Elections but it is Iranian Erections! Why you ask?

Because every four years or so, Imam, the gay spiritual leader of the everlasting Sheeple (Sheep People) Shiites of Iran, gets an erection and erects his shambool high towards the sky (in direction to Allah) via the help from Viagra, hand massage (Kabob Kubideh Making Style) and much prayer (Dava Doa). Once Imam gets a holy erection, then he erects a number of new Islamically correct candidates only from the party of Allah (Hezbollah). Usually they are colorful (Blacks, Pinks, Blues and Green Movement); however, since last erection when Hezbollah even banned and cut off his own 2 wings of so-called Moderates (Rafsanjani’s Ilk) and Reformists (Khatami’s Ilk) from the holy body of Islam, then the candidates are now only allowed from the Fundamentalist wing of the Hezbollah! Therefore, these candidates are amongst the most ape-like species of the Umma’ of Islam.

“Iranians had many choices for their 2013 elections!” (Media)
Choice 1: Hojatol Eslam Koor-ollah (Blind of Allah)
Choice 2: Hojatol Eslam Gav-ollah (Cattle of Allah)
Choice 3: Hojatol Eslam Tokhm-ollah (Testicle of Allah)

Anyhow, Imam gets an erection, erects a few apes with beard and mustache as the erection candidates and then pre plans the erections! This is how the Islamic Erections of Iran’s candidates get erected by the Imam. Afterwards, these apes line in single files to jump and sit on Imam’s Kharzeh! Imam via the help of Viagra, Namaz and Prayer (Dava Doa) gets the holy Kharzeh fully erect and bangs away these baboons one by one to make sure that they are purely Maktabi (Islamically Correct) and Houzehi (Grown Up in the Lavatful Lustful backrooms of the mosque at the Houzeh Elmiyeh Qom)! Lavat al Eslami (Islamic Anal Bangarooni) is well recommended!

Once Imam blesses the candidates with his Holy Water (Ab-e Ali) aka “Ab-e Doa” and spreads his holy juices all over the candidates’ beards; next, they become official candidates for the Umma’ of Sheeple Shiites to vote for!

Those Silly Iranian Sham Elections!
Elections, Erections or Selections?!

Next thing you know the Sheeple Shiites come by the flocks (Dasteh Dasteh) and gather like the Moameleh of the Holy Donkey (Dasteh Khar) in the major circles and mosques of Iran for protests, rally and voting!

Amongst the Umma’ are always famous characters such as “Areh, Ureh and Shamsi Kureh”! Characters such as:

* The Hezbollah Psycho with a gun
* The Basiji retard with a baton
* The Sister of Zeynab covered head to toe in chador with only a machinegun sticking out of chador
* The Dahati Village Idiot  with the beanie hat
* The Screaming Lachaki girl with pictures of Imam on her head scarf and tampon
... and then of course the role model of them all …
* The Dirty Unshaved Muslim Boy with a jack knife in one hand and Quran in other …

All the pious fruitful Umma’ of good old Muslims, all together in one place!
Truly a miracle of Allah!

This Umma’ of “Shahid Parvar” (Martyr Producing) and “Hamisheh Hazer” (always ready for appearance in public) runs the streets all the way to the voting boots with the voting boxes which are already pre counted and pre erected the next president.  Next they vote to supposedly choose the future of the IRI (Islamic Republic of Iran) aka “Islamic Republic of Heyvan” (Heyvan = animal) aka Eye-Rainian Nation!

They call them “Eye-Rainians” because they always have their “eyes” to the sky for “rain”, rather than getting off of their butts and irrigate the land via their own hard work!

Iranian 2013 Elections in Short

As you are aware of, this turn’s Sham Election’s results were:

The Chimpanzee (Ahmadinejad) left.
The Orangutan (Rouhani) came.
The Old Spider Monkey (Imam Khamenei) also came with much climax!
The Baboons aka IRGC (Sepah Pasdaran) remained in control of Eye-Rainian Nation!
The good Muslims and Umma’ of Shahid Parvar-e Sheeple Shiites celebrated this victory!

And presently the Muslim Gav O Guspandan (Cows and Sheep) or the sons and daughters of the Islamic Revolution are present in the streets to congratulate each other for this great Islamic victory!

Now you know why they are Zoological Events!

Another day, the same as many other days of the past 33 + years in the life of the Islamic Iran! Allah bless this Umma’ of Sheeple Shiites!

Definition of Democracy

Definition of Democracy is the:

Government of People by the People and for the People.

Definition of the Iranian version of Democracy is:

Government of Allah (a Sadistic Mass Murderer) by the Apes (Cleric Mullahs) for the Sheeple Shiites (Cattle)!

…… and boys and girls, in a nutshell, this was the occurrences of the Eye-Rainian Erections of this year! Until our next show (in 4 years), Allah bless you all!

Moral of the Story
(Dars-e Akhlaq)

Government of each nation is a representative of the people of that nation.

IRI is a presentation of the Iranians. IRI represents Iranians.

Iranians deserve IRI or else, they would have gotten off of their asses, commit to a bloody revolution and have overthrown IRI 33 times over, during the last 33 years!

Iranians and Americans

You can’t wait for America to make your revolutions!

Americans did not wait for the French to make their revolutions against the British, but they done it themselves!

If in 1776, Americans would have behaved as today’s Iranians, then America would still have been a British Colony the same as today’s Canada, Australia, New Zealand, etc. are (Riot, Killer)!!

If in 1776, Americans would have behaved as today’s Iranians, then the today’s Americans would have still worshiped the Queen and remained subjects of the Queen, the same as today’s Canadians, Australians, New Zealanders, etc. are (Riot, Killer)!!

On 1776 Americans clearly said:

“We bow to no Kings and Queens. We are not subjects of the Kings and Queens. We want independence.”

Iranians after 33 + years are still slaves to Islam and Mullahs!

Majority and Minority

Iranians by majority are a nation of Bi-hal (lazy asses) Sheeple Shiites with the Stockholm Syndrome, enslaved for so long by Islam and the Mullahs that they began to enjoy being slaves to Allah, Islam and the Mullahs.

Throughout the history of Iran, only a slim minority has been committed to the revolution and change and they have brought all the substantial changes to Iran.

Throughout the history, the silent majority has always remained silent. Like the cattle that they are and the materialistic, profit seeking, insect living, silent slave sheeple Shiites, they enjoyed living this way for millenniums!


If you want things to change in Iran, do not look at these Sheeple! The whole Middle East will rise and revolt but Eye-Rainians will remain silent!

Change in Iran will occur either via:

a. A Bloody Revolution by the thinking, hard working, revolutionary masses of Iran.

b. American invasion / liberation.

Everything else is Bull Shiite!

We are Alone

On 2009, we came the closest to achieve this task but as usual not a single man from the armed forces joined the revolution and not a single Olaq (donkey) from the silent majority joined the revolution. Not even a single word of support from Hussein Obama (Marxist Islamist US President) appeared in the media to warmen the hearts of the Iranian Revolutionaries. As usual, the Iranians and the World have abandoned us to fight the Islamist Beast all by ourselves!

We, the Student Movement, the Intellectuals, the Youth Movement and the Iranian Opposition planned the revolts, rushed the streets and fought with nothing but our hearts to overthrow IRI while everyone abandoned us as the orphan misfit children of Ariana.

While Obama was flirting with IRI and the Silent Majority were giving their asses away (Kun midadand) to the Mullahs and your pathetic so-called Up-Position Leaders and Feeders like Reza Pahlavi II and other Dayus, Cowards and faggots were preaching Pacifism, Cowardice and Non Violence, …… you the revolutionary youth and masses of Iran were dying in the streets and no one cared!

And the results are history …….

The bottom line is that no one will help us but ourselves. We are the orphan children of Ariana. We are the Nationalist Revolutionaries of Iran. We are the hopes and dreams of the future Iran. We are students, youth, intellectuals and the Iranian opposition.

Screw everyone else, thus they have never lifted a finger to change anything even their finished bathroom roll of toilet paper!

Here is an old poem for yous:

Bar zendeh bad goftan-e in qoum-e por farib, del maneh,

Ke yek taneh bar sangarat zanand!

(Do not rely on the “Long Live” shouts of this deceitful tribe,

Thus they will unitedly throw you in the trenches to fight alone!)

This is Iranians for you!

The Bottom Line

Iranians by majority are sheeple. They have never stood up their ground and fought the invaders, but they bent over and allowed the invaders to walk all over them, pass and conquer Iran! This is how the Iranian Culture survived for 8000 years! Iranians bent over for the Greeks, Arabs, Mongols and now for the Half Breed Mullahs!

Do not expect help neither domestic nor international.

Do not expect help from America because liberal democrats are presently in power and throughout the history, democrats have never helped the Iranian Opposition! Specifically now, the leader of the democrats is a Marxist Islamist Baboon named Hussein Obama, so forget about it, it’s New York!

Do not expect help from the silent majority because as always they live to screw each other for a fist full of dollars! They are happy living a sheepish life, screwing one another and surviving the nightmare by bending over! They are here to make profit off of your misery and pile millions over millions while you work 3 jobs to make ends meet!

Do not expect any handout from anyone. Welcome to the harsh reality!

In this war, we are all alone. We have lost the battle but we have not lost the war.

Future is bright and we still have each other.

United we conquer, divided we fall. Forget the old, future are the young! The young will build the tomorrow and end the reign of Islam in Iran. The only way that Iran will prosper will be the end of the reign of Islam in Iran.

Future is bright.

Hope for better days …….


Dr. X

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