Improved Prophets for Persians!
1st Edition: June 8, 2007
2nd Edition: August 21, 2016
A Good Muslim praying to Good Prophet
Muhammad PBUHB (Peace Be Upon
for Persians Foundation"!
This article is being published in all important Persian net media.
After a long historical brainstorming, your family doctor is offering
a Social Service; therefore, we shall post this research in all
important Persian Political Net Media! After the fictional story
on new Mongolian Religion for Persians by one of our dearly beloved
members, also revision and modernization of Islam by our other
Neo Muslim members, I began to do a lot of critical thinking.
So one day I was sitting and as usual a bright idea came to my
mind and a shining light formed above my head, Ding Dong, Daalaang
Dooloong, bells began to ring! What a bright idea!
as long as there are proposals of a new Mongolian Religion and
the possibilities of Genghis Khan being a Legal Prophet for Oppressed
Persians, also as long as Islam is being revised by Neo Muslims
to a humanitarian ideology, then why not go all the way! I mean
Genghis Khan was a messenger of God and history had done injustice
to him, so why not instead of only revising Islam, simply revise
the whole history, especially The History of Iran and Persian
knows that Persian Empire with 8000 years of rich history is the
oldest civilization in the world. Starting from Susa Civilization
in Khuzestan State of Iran all the way to the present, no other
civilization comes close to Persian civilization, China with 5000
and Egypt with 3000 years of history are not even close! However
there were a lot of invaders who invaded Persian Empire, on top
of them all, Arab Muslims had totally pillaged Iran, destroyed
structures, burned books, stole all valuables, raped women and
children, killed all men, and even tried to destroy the Persian
culture, heritage, religion, traditions, literature, poetry, and
even language! Iran survived through many invasions and cultural
calamities, yet she managed to get over them and survive; in results,
Iran is still here after 8000 years, yet many of those invading
cultures do not exist any more! Many thanks to people like Achaemenid
Commander Aryo Barzan, Sassanid Arteshbod Rostam Farokhzad, Shahanshah
Yazdgird III, Freedom Fighters Babak Khoramdin and Maziar, Anti
Arabo-/Muslim post invasion Female Lioness Commando Leaders Negan
and Banu, Abu Moslem Khorasani, Yaqub Leis Saffarid the liberator
of Iran, Ferdowsi Tusi, Reza Shah The Great Father of Nation,
Dr. Ahmad Kasravi, Dr. Kourosh Aryamanesh, and more.....Iran is
still Alive and Intact!
destroy a superior culture like the Persian Culture, which is
the Mother Culture for all Indo-European Cultures. Roots are too
deep! Persian is the mother language for all Indo-European and
Aryan Race Lingos, and the mother culture for all of them cultures
as well. Just listen to the sample vocabulary and phonics and
look at the Evolution of the Indo-European and then Aryan Races'
Languages, which had started from 8000 years ago in Iran, do you
see the Persian Roots? Here's a teaser:
So I was sitting
and thinking by myself about how Persians enjoy living in the
Fantasy and making Super Heroes, Imaginary Martyrs, Prophets,
Saints, and Imams out of their oppressors! Hey maybe this is a
new method in survival! Maybe this is how they managed to survive
through thousands of years of invasions from the East, West, North
and South! I mean it is true that Persian Empire was once the
only Super Power in the World (Achaemenids Dynasty), and then
there were also times that Persian Empire ruled Half of the Civilized
and Known World (Sassanid Dynasty), but still there were brutal
invasions and take overs of the Persian Empire throughout the
history. Iran managed to live through it. Maybe by glorifying
the oppressor and creating imaginary Prophets and Saint Imams,
they have adopted their oppressors as their protectors! Now the
question is that, was this a kind of a negative resistance or
was this living in LaLa Land and a World of Fantasy?
So here's The Deal:
Therefore I decided on why stop with Muhammad and Islam? Why not
revise the history and go all the way?
I make a proposal, a Nomination of New Prophets! I do hereby nominate
any petty barbarian, lampoon, murderer, lowlife, illiterate, savage,
and Bloodsucker who invaded Iran, as a potential New Prophet,
and also nominate their Sub Inferior Culture as the Model Culture
and their Sidekick follower Dogs as the Saints and Neo Imams for
Persians to follow! I mean Persians love to live in Fantasy and
not deal with Reality! They simply love to Mourn (Ashura and Tasua),
and make Martyrs out of Bandits (Shiite Imams)! So I can give
them more reasons to do ceremonies! More days to celebrate foreign
barbarian savages' birth-dates, Death Anniversaries, and battle
days (What Episodes!)!
I hereby Nominate
New Prophets, a whole new line of Martyr Saint Imams, all kinds
of New Religions Created from teachings of these bandits! Why
stop with Islam, why stop with worshiping only a Black Rock in
Kabbah, Mecca, which was originally called Allah?! Why only make
Muhammad the bandit, a messenger of God and create a dozen of
Saints out of our Rectums? Let me propose to you a dozen of other
prophets, their sidekick Saint Imams, and a separate religion
created by every single one of these murderers!
I am going
to create so many Saints and Martyrs for Persians to make ceremonies,
mourning, crying and to reminisce all year long! I mean, as long
as Persians love to mourn, cry, and reminisce over some dead murdering
Arab Bandits who slaughtered them by the thousands (Ali, Hassan,
Hussein), also making Saints out of them, well then let me give
you a whole new line of Prophets, Saints, Imams, all coming with
their own new Religions for Persians to follow and create teachings,
stories, tails of heroism, bravery, and to mourn over their death!
A new line of prophets by Ahreeman (I kill me!)!
Ashura/Tasua/Moharam all year long. Let me give you more reasons
to mourn, cry, Sing Marsiyeh "Rowzeh Khani" Holy songs,
Chest Banging (Sineh Zani), Chain Banging (Zanjir Zani), Dagger
Head Banging (Qameh Zani), and Head Banging (Tu Sar Zani) for
some of the most Ruthless Blood Suckers in history of the world,
and let's make it all year long. Let everyday be an Ashura, and
you can cry everyday, while singing Rowzeh Religious Songs and
Reminisce about how these Beasts destroyed your culture and killed
your ancestors and for sure banged the hell out of your women
Brother Olaq: Ya Muhammad al Arab, would you please save us Persians?!
Muhammad: OK Olaq al Ajam, I will have mercy on your souls, Allah is merciful!
and Hussein killed your fathers, banged your mothers and raped
your sisters, but now you worship them and title them infallible
Imams! So by all means, allow me to give you more Prophets and
Imams! Cry and mourn Persians, cry forever
Namaz Jum'a of Tehran!
I will give
you more options, more religions, more reason for mourning, more
new heroes and Martyrs, and for sure More New Prophets! I will
give you thousand more reasons to cry and bang your heads away,
everyday of the year! Please observe and take my proposal serious.
I only care about these Masses of Martyr Loving, Religion Following,
God Fearing, Cleric Glorifying, Law Abiding Citizens (Omat-e Shahid
Parvar)! I only do this for the love of Umma'!
Umma' al Shiite Islam
I hereby propose
these New Prophets, mentioning their Lands and Roots, their new
religion, the name for their followers of that religion, and their
Sidekick Saint Imams. The more blood-thirsty they were, the Imported
Religion shall be worshiped more! And this is the Persian Style!
Let's start mentioning all the barbarian savages who invaded Iran
since the beginning of the history, their motivator dictator Guru,
and their Sidekick Lap Dog Generals and Earls, Oops I mean Saints!
Actually I am making a foundation: "The Prophet for Persians"
Now the funny
thing is that mostly these nominated prophets had only one Human
Imam, sometimes an Animal Doggie Imam, yet Islam had a whole bunch
of Imam Saints, and more are getting created in the production
line by the minute! The Persian Production Line of Imagination
that is! Shiite Islam is so fertile when it comes to Imams! Here
we go baby, Hale Luya, I can already see the light, here we go,
Prophets by the historical order.
More Prophets = More Shrines & Mourning = More money for Clerics
More Money, Mo Money, Mo Money, Mo Money and Mo Money $ $ $ ......
New Improved Prophets!
Prophets by the Historical Order of Appearance in Iran!
Researched By: "Prophets for Persians Foundation"
Kulak Sais The Scythian Sak
Roots: Scythian, Skiths (Saka-ha or Sak-ha) [Sag-ha]
Religion: Dog Worship-ism (Sag Parasti) [Dog = Sag]
Followers: Doggists (Sakist-ha, Sag Parastan)
Prophet: Kulak Sais (Kulak kard madare sahab bacharo!)
Imam: His Mix Breed Yellow/White, Yellow Skinned Aryan
Dog (Sag-e Zard, a Doggie Imam)
[The Yellow Dog, brother of Jackal AKA Sag-e Zard, Baradar-e Shoqal]
Alexander The Macedonian (Alexandra
Roots: Macedonian/Greek (Fruit)
Religion: Analism, Greek Style Back Door-ism (Kun kunak-ism) [Kun Kunak]
Followers: Analists, Gay Bears, Homo Erectors (Kun kunaki-ha) [Obana-ye Qazvin, Qom va Navahi]
Prophet: Alexander The Insane Drunk Homosexual (The Greek Fairy)
Imam: Selecus Nictar (Solukus, His Boy Toy), Some Gay Boy on 5th Avenue
Heftalito The Heathen Hittite
Religion: Heathen-ism (Haramzadeh Parasti)
Followers: Heathens (Haramzadegan) [Haroom Loqmeha]
Imam: Akhesh-Navar (Khoshk Khoshk Kunak)
Tumen The Hun
Roots: Hun Turks
Religion: Hun-ism, Blood Spillism, Blood Suckerism (Khun-ism,
Followers: Hunists, Blood Suckers (Khunists, Khun-Kharan)
Prophet: Tumen The Hun
Imam: Muhan The Hun
Muhammad The Arab Barbarian
Roots: Arab-Muslims (Lizard Eating Nomad Bedouin Desert
Religion: Islam, AKA: Backwardness Fanaticism (Eslam, Arab
Parasti, Aqab Mandegi-ye Fekri)
Followers: Muslims, Arab Worshipers (Mojrems, Arab Parastan, Aqab Mandegan-e Fekri)
Prophet: Muhammad, the all times greatest polygamist, pedophile,
murderer, charlatan actor!
Imam: Omar, Osman, Ali, Hassan, Hussein, Ruhollah Khomeini,
Sed Ali Khamenei, A Moral Muslim Praying Dog (Sag-e Zard-e Namaz-Khan),
Some Neo Arab Bastard (Yek Arab-e Dayus), and more Imams getting created daily by the Umma' of Imam parvar!
Toqrul Beyk The Seljuq Turk
Roots: Seljuq Turks
Religion: Donky Worship-ism, Donky-ism (Olaq Parasti), Khariyat
Followers: Donky Worshipers, Donky-ists (Olaq Parastan), Torkan-e Khar
Prophet: Toqrul Beyk
Imam: Alb Arsalan, Some Neo Turk Donkey (Yek Khar-e Tork-e Jadid)
Genghis Khan The Mongol Savage
Roots: Mongols (Retarded Turkish Oriental Barbarians)
Religion: Mongolism, Mongrelization-ism (Vahshi Parasti,
Eqlan [like Eslam], Moqolism, Aqab Oftadegi-ye Zehni)
Followers: Mongols, Mongrels (Vohush, Moqlem [like Moslem],
Moqalman [like Mosalman], Mooqool)
Prophet: Ghingis Khan (Changiz-e Moqol, The Great Leech), Khun Khar-e Kabir
Imam: Hulagu Khan, Ye Moqol-e Kos Kesh-e Dige
Timur Lang The Turkmen Blood-Sucker
Roots: Taimuri Turkmens
Religion: Tribalism, Bedouinism (Torkestanism, Qozism,
Followers: Tribalists, Bedouists, Murderers(Chador Neshinan, Qoz-ha,
Prophet: Amir Taimur-e Lang The Crippled (Taimur-e Cholaq-e
Jani), Adam Kosh-e Cholaq
Imam: His Lap Turkish Dog with Rabies (Sag-e Har-e Taimuri,
this religion has a Doggie Imam, so you must worship the dog!)
Mahmoud Afghan The Animal
Roots: Ghalzay Afghans
Religion: Barbarianism, AKA: Taliban Ancestor-ism, Hick Worship (Vahshigariye
Dari, Dahati Parasti)
Followers: Taliban, Afghan Barbarian Fanatical Muslims, Hicks (Vohush-e
Prophet: Mahmoud Afghan AKA Taliban's Godfather (Pedar Bozorg-e Taliban)
Imam: Ashraf Afghan AKA Taliban's Small-father
Persians just love their prophets!
Some dog becomes road kill in the freeway and next thing you know, Persians burry the dog, build a mausoleum and create a shrine over the mausoleum. After a while the new shrine becomes a place of pilgrimage and worship! Next thing you know, Emamzadeh Sagollah (Shrine of the Dog of Allah) is born and Sagollah will become a sidekick Imam for the ever loving Shiite Umma’ to worship, mourn his death, cry and even head bang and chest bang for him on Ashura!
More money, mo money, mo money and mo money for Shiite charities and clerics to be made!
What can I say?
The Persian expression states:
Ta khar dar jahan baqist,
Mofles dar nemimanad!
(Until there are donkeys [idiots] in the world,
The poor [clerics] will survive and thrive!)
Allah is passionate and merciful!
Days all year long boys and girls.... and more will come up in
the future. I am sure these Martyr Saint loving Masses, these
God Fearing masses, this Omat-e shahid Parvar va hamishe hazer
va hamishe dar sahneh, will help me to create more Holy Saints
and Prophets for them! What an episode (riot)!
Your Chairman on "Prophets for Persians Foundation",
And your family Doctor,
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