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Those Funny Crazy Persians:
Part 1

Only in Iran
Those Funny Crazy Persians: Part 1

Ahreeman X
May 22, 2008

Dr. Frank J. Suck-Dasti
Great Music Historian-Scholar and a pioneer in the fine art of Suck-Dasting (Hand Job). I am sure that all of you Suck-Dasts, Master-Bators and Hand-On-Jobers are well familiar with Dr. Suck-Dasti’s research and contributions to the fine art of Suck-Dasting! In this picture, Dr. Suck-Dasti is revealing the measurement of his ……

It must’ve been an extremely interesting speech about Halaal and Haraam elements in Islam!

Even after your death, your seat in the Majlis will be reserved and decorated with your picture and robe. They will even provide you with the fine spring bottled water and plastic cups! Only in Iran baby, only in Iran ……

Hojaj, this is not High School, Aqa is speaking, stop playing with your palm-top and start paying attention to Ma’lum O Majhul (Known and Unknown Religious Problems in Islam)!

Masha-Allah Baba Jan, just a little bit to the left ……

Dress Police: Stop running away Saliteh, come on your own to the station. Bitch, this is not a Michael Jackson concert, you are in streets of Tehran. In case you are forgetting, no Gay Colors are allowed. Besides, where is your chador or scarf?
Zhila: Catch me if you can Bozos!

Baba jan you must be really thirsty!

During a Majlis official hearing
Hojatol Eslam Rajab: Check out my new mobile …
Hojatol Eslam Naqi: Forget about it (Italian Style), mine is the latest Motorola. Check it out …

Kun-o bezan, Haji Kun-o koja mibarin?
(Check out the asses, haji where are you taking the asses?)
Rajab: Baba relax, they are only mannequins!

High Tech Cleric Cameraman!
This must be the cameraman for the Mo’talefeh (Fundamentalist Party) Channel.

Haj Khanum, are you reading Namaz prayer towards the direction of Mecca or the black-market Satellite Dish?

Please don’t pee on the wall!

Yadollah took the truck, so I had no other means to deliver the load!

Martyr Mahmoud Ahmadinejad Alley
Ahmadi: Baba I’m still alive! It’s a blooper!

Hojatol Eslam Sag-Dast (Doggy-hand): Hassan, make a diagram, so after Sofreh, we can find our precious flip-flops!

Ahmadi: Haaay Nenah, hay foshar menah (Dahati Accent)!
Ya Mahdi, someone is pulling my balls in this crowd …

Dahati, Badbakht, Qorbati, illiterate students, first go learn how to spell, then release slogans of Down with America!

Contradictory Sales-booth
Left banner: All types of books for better understanding of the Bahai condemned sect are available!
Right banner: Salute to Mahdi, the reviver of the Pure Mohammedan Islam!

Neo fashionable Islamic Hejab!

Phone Company sign: Labors are at work!
Namakdun: No wonder the phone system is a mess and I can never dial Iran!

Groom: well, I figured why not cut through the chase and hit two birds with one stone. Why not just marry the first two wives simultaneously rather than committing polygamy step by step through the years to come?!

Sign: Bringing animals (dogs, …) to the park is absolutely forbidden.
I’m glad that the city explained the definition of the animals or else I could have brought me a Mullah to the park!

Ad: Speak Persian without the accent!
Attention Residents from outside Tehran
No matter from what beautiful town in Iran you may belong, whatever sweet accent that you may have, belongs to your own town. If you want to speak Persian with no accent, then for more information call Ms. Asadi at these numbers …

Natural Latex
Master (Ostad) Industrial Gloves, Ideal for All “Hand Jobs”!

Damn Inconsiderate Woman! I wonder how long she will be in the beauty parlor? Kids are getting bored and tired!

Smart Girl: Hey, I can do my homework and sell a few packs of gum at the same time and make some money to buy candy!

Excuse me lady, is that outfit by the Islamic dress code?!

Taqi: Let’s go, there’s a armed robbery in progress!
Naqi: Wait a second, I’m text-messaging Roqiyeh, you wanna see her new hejab-less picture?
Taqi: Na, she already sent me a naked one, do you want to see it?

Mullah Biker
And here comes Easy Rider on his chopper …
Hojatol Eslam Zakir: Dali Moosheh, Peek-a-boo!

Kur Oqli: Baba curb your enthusiasm and let Aqa go by.
Kachal Hamzeh: Ohoy, someone grabbed Aqa’s turban!
Kur Oqli: Grab the turban thief!

Sign: Illiterate, this is the bell ring, not the lamp switch!

Sign in the phone cab: Fare 600
Limit your cell phone calls
Attention certain couples: Please leave your seatbelts on, until the end of the fare.
Question: Does this mean that we can have sex in the cab with the seatbelts on?

This particular shot of Ahmadinejad in the mosque must be so important because the photographers are actually jumping over each other’s shoulders to take it!

At the back of the bus seat:
Fast Proxy (Internet Filter Breaker) Address

Ahmadinejad: But any contact between the opposite sex in Islam is Haraam!
Batool Khanum: Relax Ahmadi, I can be your mother, besides I have gloves on and I’m only kissing your head with the lipstick, so it’s not direct contact between opposite sexes’ body parts of my lips and your hair! Allah is forgiving, Allah is also passionate!

At the Friday Prayer in the Mosque
Kid: I have never smelled so much ass in my whole life! For Allah’s sake take some shower and use body spray on them asses!

Only in Iran baby, only in Iran. To be continued ……

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