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Those Funny Crazy Persians: Part 14
 

Only in Iran
Those Funny Crazy Persians: Part 14
Ahreeman X
February 21, 2016


Imam Khamenei Condom!
Islamically Correct and Halaal Condoms made in Qom!
Imam on condom cover: Didn’t I tell you no?!


Funny Persian Park Sign
“Humor and Hookers (without rooms) are against your college student manners!”
Before revision read:
“Humor and Laughter are against your college student manners!”


Iranian Funny Wizard
Flying Witch “Broom Yadollah” flies away …
Check out the high jump, broom, flip flops and the face, Persian Style!


Evolution of Persian Dance: Persian Traditional Folkloric Dance
Ziba (left): Is my makeup drooping?
Gita (middle standing): Don’t worry about the makeup, smile to the camera …
Bita (middle sitting): I can’t hold this pose anymore, my arm is sleeping numb!
Roya (right): Tough it out, don’t be a sissy, check me out holding my Persian pose steady.


Evolution of Persian Dance: Traditional Baba Karam Thug Dance
Zohreh (front): OK everybody, shake and shift the ass to the left, qonbol konin!
Shohreh (left): I’m getting turned on, Akh Akh joon khosham umad!
Gorbeh (2nd left): Put your shoes back on, your feet stinks Shohreh!
Robabeh (3rd left): Wow Qonboleh, you got lots of junk in the trunk, what a grand ass, Kun Tapeh!
Qonboleh (right): I know, I been eating lot’s of Abgoosht! That’s why I’m taking Persian Dance to lose some o that Persian ass!


Evolution of Persian Dance: Persian Lesbian Dirty Dance
At a Green Movement Night Party, Tehran
Nahid (left): You surely putting up a show tonight! Where did you learn the moves?
Afaq (right): From Haji (cleric pilgrim), this morning at the mosque before the noon prayer!


Evolution of Persian Dance: Persian Grabby Ass Dance
Zhila Qonboli [Fat Bottom Zhila] (left): Oh my God, let go of my junk! Eva khak tu saram, chikar mikoni?
Mehri Kaneh [Clinging Mehri] (right): This is an ass to die for! This is what they call “The Persian Ass Grab”, I just can’t let go! Kun-o bezan, har chi khordeh pas nadadeh!


Evolution of Persian Dance: Persian Solo Dance
Asiyeh Maqze Roon [Beefy Thigh Asiyeh]: You girls call that ass?! Give it to the dog and see even the dog wouldn’t bite that! Now this here is called “Prime Persian Ass”! Check out all the junk in the trunk and the chunky thighs, they are made for Abgoosht (Persian Stew)! That’s the way you shake your money maker, c’mon baby, qeresh bedeh Persian Style!


Evolution of Persian Dance: Persian Gay Bear Dance
Hair, Leather and Underwear, Persian Style! Pashm O Charm O Tonekeh!
Qafar Lab Shikari [Sweet Lips Qafar] (left): Ye lab bedeh hajit, tok meme ro bebinam, memet chindi? (Give your pilgrim a kiss, let me pinch your nipple, have you plucked them nipples?!)
Abdi Pashmi [Hairy Abdi] (right): Mohawk-o bezan! Shortak-e kun nama ro bezan! Zabun-o bigir! (Check out the Mohawk and buttock-less underwear! Tong me baby!)


Persian Bikers
Please meet “Naneh Motori” the Motor Granny who enjoys parking her bike on the Persian carpet! Easy Rider, Persian Style!


Persian Bikers
Bike Towing Service, Persian Style!


Persian Bikers
Iranian School Bus! Driver rides the kids to school!
Panj Tarkeh didin?


Funny Iranian Furniture Career
Don’t have a truck? Not to worry, this is how to carry furniture in Tehran’s Streets!


“Iranian Women Soccer Team banned from international tournaments due to some of the players being men!” (Media)
“Iranian Transsexuals are on the rise due to cheap sex operations in Iran” (Media)
“Imam Khomeini founder of IRI banned Gays but legalized Transsexuals!” (Media)
Iranian Female National Team: Men amongst us?! Hell no!
Ahreeman Joon: Really? Now check it out, except the 3 on top row left and 1 on top row right, every single one is either gay, transvestite or transsexual! I know for facts that Persian girls are not this ugly and big boned, so either they handpicked these girls amongst the “Ugliest Iranian Girls Contest” or they simply did not check out their shambool and schlong when drafted them!


“Iranian Women Soccer Team banned from international tournaments due to some of the players being men!” (Media)
“Iranian Transsexuals are on the rise due to cheap sex operations in Iran” (Media)
“Imam Khomeini founder of IRI banned Gays but legalized Transsexuals!” (Media)
Coach (right): Are you crying because they banned us?
Saliteh (left): No, because last month I had a sex op. but now I’m having second thoughts about cutting off my Moameleh but it’s too late now!
Ahreeman Joon: Sing it baby - And it’s too late, too late, too late for love,
Yes it’s too late, too late, too late for love,
Lala La La, La La, Lala Lala ……


“Iranian Women Soccer Team banned from international tournaments due to some of the players being men!” (Media)
“Iranian Transsexuals are on the rise due to cheap sex operations in Iran” (Media)
“Imam Khomeini founder of IRI banned Gays but legalized Transsexuals!” (Media)
Ahreeman Joon: Are you trying to tell me these guys are girls?
Look at the cheek bones, chins and ugly faces, will ya?
If these guys are girls, then tomorrow I’ll change my name from Ahreeman to Muhammad Ali!


“Iranian Women Soccer Team banned from international tournaments due to some of the players being men!” (Media)
“Iranian Transsexuals are on the rise due to cheap sex operations in Iran” (Media)
“Imam Khomeini founder of IRI banned Gays but legalized Transsexuals!” (Media)
Coach (out of the picture): Don’t raise your legs too high, you might rip your virginity curtains!
Guys: Don’t worry coach, we are still pre ops., we got our Kharzeh and Balls!


“Iranian Women Soccer Team banned from international tournaments due to some of the players being men!” (Media)
Iranian Women National Team during practice
Kaka Soqra [Black Soqra] (left): Hey Soosoo, don’t stretch too much, you might rip something down there!
Soosoo (right): Don’t worry I still have my schlong!


“Iranian Women Soccer Team banned from international tournaments due to some of the players being men!” (Media)
Iranian Women National Team during practice
Narges [Yellow Top] (right) to Zohreh Kolofteh [Thick Zohreh # 2] (middle): Hey you didn’t wrap your Moameleh from beneath, between your butt cheeks and tie it around your waist and you didn’t wear cups; your junk is hanging between your legs like a soaked diaper! Go to locker and wrap it up!


“Iranian Women Soccer Team banned from international tournaments due to some of the players being men!” (Media)
Iran vs. Philippines
Sonya (left): Let go of my nipple you Persian Dyke!
Soosoo (right): Don’t lift up my shirt, my Kabob Kubideh and 2 Gojeh (charbroiled tomatoes) are already hanging out of my underwear, you can cause my pants to drop and the FIFA to ban us again!


“Iranian Women Soccer Team banned from international tournaments due to some of the players being men!” (Media)
“There are rumors going around about Ali Karimi, the Iranian Men National Team Player!” (Media)
Yadi (left): Are you also a man?
Karimi (right): Of course I’m a man you fool! I’m playing the men national team, don’t I? However, I have to admit, my situation is reverse, I used to be a woman but now I’m a man!


“Iranian Women Soccer Team banned from international tournaments due to some of the players being men!” (Media)
Hameleh: I swear to Allah that I’m not a man but I’m a fat Arab woman who couldn’t get any nookie in the Arab Lands; so I heard that Iranian Women National Team is hiring, so I rushed to Iran for tryouts! Who knows, maybe I get lucky and drafted, so I can “Lez Around” (lesbian around) with all of these Iranian Transsexuals and Transvestites, no?!


“Iranian Women Soccer Team banned from international tournaments due to some of the players being men!” (Media)
Rouhani: Now I swear to Allah, I demand to join the team!
Coach (not in the picture): Shave the beard and mustache, then maybe!


“Iranian Women Soccer Team banned from international tournaments due to some of the players being men!” (Media)
Babes Team: Can we join the Iranian Women Team?
Iranian Team: No, you are women!


“Iranian Women Soccer Team banned from international tournaments due to some of the players being men!” (Media)
Brazilian Transsexual Pre Op. Soccer Team: We still have our schlongs; can we join the Iranian Women Team?


“Iranian Women Soccer Team banned from international tournaments due to some of the players being men!” (Media)
Brazilian Transsexual Post Op. Soccer Team: Now we don’t have our schlongs anymore, but we surely can join the Iranian Women Team!


“Iranian Women Soccer Team banned from international tournaments due to some of the players being men!” (Media)
“German team played with Hejab in Iran!” (Media)
Iran vs. Germany
German Team to Persian audience: We heard the Iranian Team are trannies, we are also into Trans, can we all hook up and see their shambools?!


“Iranian Women Soccer Team banned from international tournaments due to some of the players being men!” (Media)
“Iranian Opposition protest during the tournament.” (Media)
Ahreeman Joon: Once again the Iranian Opposition ruined a perfect Tranny Event! What do you have against the Trans?!


“Iranian Women Soccer Team banned from international tournaments due to some of the players being men!” (Media)
Iranian Women Soccer Fans: We want Dool (Penis), we don’t care on men, women or trans, we just want Dool! Long live Dool!


“Iranian Women Soccer Team banned from international tournaments due to some of the players being men!” (Media)
Iranian Woman Soccer Fan: Hey guys, you must have Nanaz (Vagina) like this to play, No Suzie, No Play!


“Iranian Women Soccer Team banned from international tournaments due to some of the players being men!” (Media)
“Iranian Women supported the Team in the Tournament.” (Media)
Sudi (right): Do you have Dool too?
Rudi (left): Joon? Nah, Naaaa, not me, I got Suzie!


“Iranian Hollywood Style Action Movie ‘First Move’ broke records!” (Media)
Detective Sonbol: Hey stop making fun of me, do you think it’s easy to play in a cheesy Iranian Action Movie, a Hollywood knock off, with low budget, bunch of gay guys and wearing hejab?!


And now for something totally different, we introduce to you: The Persian Seesaw!


“Iranian Economy and Inflation has made the Rial worthless against the Dollar!” (Media)
“Islam destroyed Iran’s Economy!” (Media)
Mickey Mouse Money vs. Real Money!
Akbar: Gimme one of these Ben Franklins and I’ll hand you all of these Monopoly Dough! Hey, they have pictures of Imam on them!


“Punk Rockers are on the rise in Iran!” (Media)
Iranian Gay Muslim Punks!
The placard in the hands of the punk on the left reads:
“Death to Israel”
The placard in the hands of the punk on the right reads:
“Islam has found a rebirth in the Fajr Decade”
Ahreeman Joon: Questions come to mind:
1. Excuse me punks but don’t you think your sissy faggy get ups and hairdo are in contradiction with your hardcore militant Islamist placards?
2. Don’t you think it is more beneficial for you to go and listen to punk music, body slam, head bang, dance and bang each others’ butts than to participate in Islamist political protests?
3. Hezbollah or Basij in Iran would love to get their hands and dicks on you, so by a fat chance, if they set their eyes on you during a protest, they will surely kidnap you, take you to their lair and torture bang you for weeks!  After they’re done, most likely you will end up in hospital’s ER with torn asses and bruised bodies! So don’t you think it is more beneficial and less hazardous to your health to just cut the crap, drop the placards, fly the protests and save your butts?
Ahreemanic Solution:
Bache Kuni-ha shomaha berin kun bedin o shambool-e Haji Mahmoud ro bokhorin! Shoma ro che be tazahorat-e Eslami? Shoma berin ye rah posht-e masjed ba Haj Sed Javad jenabat konin o lavat! Hala digeh Bache Kuni-ha ham Eslami shodand! Chaqal Bacheha, pashin berin Kundun Masjed! Ah Mashallah, Ya Allah bache!


“Iranian Gay Pop Stars Kamran and Hooman release 'If I don’t Exist' (Man Age Nabasham).” (Media)
Kamran: Listen, we got no talent, so let’s wear some bling bling and tacky clothes to sell some albums.
Hooman: And surely throw some gang signs in the shot to make us look cool!


“Iranian Gay Pop Stars Kamran and Hooman release ‘I’m Going Crazy’ (Daram Divooneh Misham).” (Media)
“Kamran and Hooman are Moody Blue!” (Media)
Kamran: I’m going crazy baby, your face gives me constipation!
Hooman: I’m Moody Blue, your outfit is so gay!


“Iranian Gay Pop Stars Kamran and Hooman release ‘I’m Going Crazy’ (Daram Divooneh Misham).” (Media)
“Kamran and Hooman are Moody Blue!” (Media)
Behind Stage, After the Show
Hooman: I’m going crazy and so moody blue, let’s all get naked and have an all male orgy! Let’s jump each others’ bones and make a quartet sandwich! I’m going crazy baby …
Kamran: Ahay bache kuni-ya, biyayn hame ba ham kun-e ham konim o donya ro az daricheye digari bebinim! Daram divooneh misham!


“Iranian Gay Pop Stars Kamran and Hooman release ‘I’m Going Crazy’ (Daram Divooneh Misham).” (Media)
“Kamran and Hooman are Moody Blue!” (Media)
“Kamran and Hooman got a Persian Gay Bear Roadie!” (Media)
Ali Kolahak: They call me Ali Kolahak (Ali the Helmet) because my schlong’s tip is like Nazi German soldiers’ helmets! After putting the music and stage equipment away, I like to get naked, strap leather and dance in the sun! I been with Kamran and Hooman for a long time. After each show, they get moody blue and they need to go crazy baby, so backstage, I rip them a couple of new holes and shove the Persian Gay Bear Sword up their sissy faggy tushies! Come get some o this bear, Me so horny, I’m going crazy baby, daram divooneh misham!


“Imam Khamenei is a secret fan of Hussein Obama!” (Media)
After the US – IRI Nuclear Deal
Imam Khamenei: I also go crazy when I see this slender and tall Dhimmi Boy wiggling his black butt and sweeten up to me! As the Holy Prophet PBUHB (Peace Be Upon His Bone) used to state “Lavat-on Savab-on” (Islamic Butt Banging has afterlife benefits)! Prophet (PBUHB) was also found of “Slender Black Boys”! I love sticking the scimitar of Islam in the middle of infidel’s little black tushy bung holio!
Obama: Praise be upon Allah, Islam is religion of peace!


Peter Khan Zendran Gay Wanna Be Turkmen Iranian Criminally Insane Transvestite
During the Solo Shower S&M Session
(Photo sent by women who he stalks and harasses online.)
Reporter (not in the picture): Peter, are you also a fan of Kamran and Hooman?
Peter: No, I’m just flat out Crazy! I’m going crazy baby! This is my crazy, white titty, insane pose! I go solo S&M water sport in the shower!


Peter Khan Zendran Gay Wanna Be Turkmen Iranian Criminally Insane Transvestite
During the Solo Shower S&M Session
(Photo sent by women who he stalks and harasses online.)
Reporter (not in the picture): Why are you dressed in bras, holding a Kama Nunchuck, and sending a lab qoncheh kiss?
Peter: Because I’m going crazy baby! I’m erotically insane and I’m going to take a solo S&M Shower!


Iranian Gay Thug Butt Blaster Javad Banagoosh
Reporter (not in the picture): Are you also a fan of Kamran and Hooman?
Javad: No, but I’m going crazy!
Reporter: Why?
Javad: Me so horny!
Reporter: What do you do about it?
Javad: Chasing chadori women, bache kuni sissy boys, and little poodle dogs or baby lambs down the dark alley to catch and do the nasty to them!
Reporter: Why do they call you Javad Banagoosh?
Javad: Look at my mustache! I’m a certified Persian Thug and my mustache is all the way down to my ears! Sebil az banagoosh dar rafteh!
Reporter: Did you go to school?
Javad: No, but I have a degree in Persian Perversions!

Only in Iran baby, only in Iran. To be continued ……

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