Riding in Wild Wild East and Fantasies of Iranian Opposition!
A Classic
Ahreeman X
Written: July 13, 2003
Republished: July 27, 2007

Halaal Meat
The famous Uber Cow of Shiite, a cartoon character created by me and produced by IPC Productions, representing an overwhelming Shiite population of the Iranian Cattle followers of Allah!

L. Iranian Don Quixote (Don Kichote)
The typical Political Guru of the Iranian Opposition Groups in Exile or Inxile, absolutely out of touch with realities of the present situation in Iran!
R. Iranian Sancho Panza
The faithful, hand kisser, ball polisher, Persian flatterer, Side Kick Servant of The Iranian Political Guru, also out of touch with realities of the "As Is" Iranian Situation!

Opposition Leader,
Do it like Imam,
Ride em in,
Roll em in,
Row em up,
Ride em in,
Raw Hide!
Riding The Wild Wild East!
Riding The Wild Wild East!

Introduction

Definitions:
* Iranians in Exile: Iranians forced to live outside of Iran.
* Iranians in Inxile: Iranians living in Exile, inside Iran and due to the oppression of the occupational Shiite system of the government!

Taking a walk back in the memory lane … It is very interesting to re-read this article. It is interesting to review my mindset, predictions and analysis of the situation back then. Clearly everything went on as I had predicted! The Charade is on going …! This article makes more sense now than ever! Let us review this article and learn from the history. Let us take a cruise back in to the memory lane and in to the psyche of our great Eye-Rainian Up-Position. Please enjoy this classic article.

Riding in Wild Wild East and Fantasies of Iranian Opposition!

Raw Hide!

What an episode! The other day I dropped by Pal Talk (net meeting) Iranian Political Rooms and I have seen it all! I have seen a dozen of different rooms with a few dozen of Iranians in each room, considered to be Iranian Opposition and banging on each other's heads, while the regime has been running Iran for 24 years and it will run Iran for another 24 years, unless 2 conditions will take place:

A) A Bloody Revolution
An uprising of the masses of Iran directed via all opposition groups, in a united front, causing an internal Revolution. The way things are going, this is not happening and it has been a dream during the last 24 years!

B) United States Military Intervention
This is the alternative scenario to overthrow the IRI; however, the way things are going in Afghanistan and Iraq, it seems like USA has her hands full! American Soldiers are dying at the rate of one per day in Iraq! America is loosing more troops in the present occupation time in Iraq than during the wartime over there! I do not believe that President Bush will start getting himself in another episode in Iran or at least not until the 2nd term! He needs to stabilize the Iraqi and Afghani situation first!

Therefore, Iran will remain doomed at least until the near future!

Iranian Opposition in Exile and Iranian people in Exile are living in LaLa Land! What do you expect from the every day people of Exile, when even their leaders and entertainers are out of touch with the reality?! Take a good look at what has happened during the last month, will you?

For a good 3 weeks period, we (The Real Opposition) have been planing the unrests of the 18 Tir (July 9). From the beginning we did not have high hopes for the unrests to be explosive, but then again we believe that all of these little unrests will eventually lead to a larger riot and all of these larger riots will eventually lead to a larger one and more effective one. However, the Miracle Workers and Magicians of Los Angeles and DC, have been promising the Promised Land to the public! Also, the public themselves, have been creating fantasies out of their desperations and homesickness! It is simply amazing! Let's review some of these events.

Take a good look at all of these Wanna Be Opposition Leaders of Iran in LaLa Land, let's do an analysis:

24 Hour Radios/TVs

Check out 24 hour "Subscribed Radios" and "Satellite TVs" of the Iranian type! These fled by night Iranian Mass Hysteria (Mass Media, Iranian Style), have been promising the Earth and the Sun to the Lost Iranian People in Exile! Every year they do the same thing! Who can forget some of these Jokers and wanna be Journalists and Anchor Persons interviewing CNN and FOX with their broken English accent and illiterate choice of words, preaching on international tribunes and American Media, about the way that they are in touch with Iran via cellular phones and they do predict that for sure the Iranian Exiles will to be in Tehran International Airport by the same time next year?! They have insisted on Iranian Exiles to be landing in Iran and speaking from Iran to the American Media by this time, next year! These illiterate, out of touch, exiled Radio Show Hosts or TV Talk Show Hosts, consider themselves as opposition leaders who are behind every unrest and riot inside Iran. They actually are in Denial!

De Nial (The Nile) is not only a river in Egypt, yet also an Iranian Disease!

These Jokers blue print the unrests, agitate the masses, send amazing messages to Iran, cause Revolutions, conduct interviews with American Media and predict that we will all be in Iran by end of the year! The only problem is that, these jokers have been preaching the same Shiite for the last 24 years and every year the same story and especially on Nowruz, Chahar Shanbe Suri, 22 Bahman (Anniversary of the creation of IRI) or 18 Tir (Anniversary of Unrests), these rhetorics become flaming Hot! Every year the same story!

Iranian Ragazines/Toilet Papers in LA

Our beloved Journalists and "In-tell-egg-chew-alls" of Los Angeles are also doing their shares! Every single petty tabloid publisher in LA suddenly becomes an opposition leader and publishes rhetorics on how we will be in Tehran by the dinnertime this evening! Of Course they will not forget to bad-mouth the Radio/TV Owners and Hosts in their Rags and Toilet Papers! It is amazing to see the declining rate of what our political journalists used to be and write inside Iran and before 1979, and then again, to observe these baboons, wanna be journalists making an Ass of themselves in the public today! Feel free to pick up any Iranian Toilet Paper such as Kayhan London on any week of the month and you will notice amazing lies (in this case Shahollahi) coming out of the rectums! Promises are sky high and in every occasion IRI is about to collapse! The same goes with other Ragazines and Toilet Papers of Mojaheds, Tudehis and other Up-position residues!

Fantastic Pal Talk Room Owners

Boy, these guys are really out there! Have you ever checked out some of these guys? Check out a few dozen weekly active pal talk Iranian Political Rooms with their owners and activists! These guys are "Legends in their own minds". I do not know what went wrong but it is a pity that due to hardships of Exile, some of our bright Doctors/Professors/Politicians of Iran went Whacked, bizarre, lost touch with reality and created a fantasy world of their own in Pal Talk! Each of these guys manage to gather an audience of a few dozen people (often on welfare or retired) on pal talk and they start deciding the future of Iran in these Cyber rooms with few dozens of their followers! One day they make Revolution, one day Riot, one day they destroy IRI and one day they fight their enemies in Exile amongst the opposition! Many of them fight a Multi Front War with IRI and Opposition Enemies! They are really Out There in LaLa Land! The perfect example of some of these poor Psycho Political Leaders of Iran are Doctor Oskuee, Monarchist Rooms, Jebhe Meli Psychos, Tudehi Tavarishes of Pal Talk, Fedayee LaLa Landers of Aksariat and of course 101 Communist Rooms of Pal Talk! I am telling you, I beg you to please go and listen to these guys, will you? It will be the best entertainment that you can get for free! Actually there are many Iranians who just go there from time to time for a good laughter! Our beloved Opposition on Pal Talk has been leading the Iranian Revolution from the rooms of Pal Talk, some of them are not just harmless loony beans anymore, but they are a threat to the society! Some of these Pal Talk Leaders actually believe that IRI and Hezbollah are after them and agents are coming from Tehran to kill them on daily bases! They believe that other opposition leaders in Pal Talk are also after them to punish them! These Mental Case Doctors are battling the beasts in many fronts! Some Monarchists are fighting the Hezbollah, Mullahs, Tudehis, Jebheis, other Monarchists and even CIA and MI5! I am telling you, these guys are Out There! Talking about the saga of "Don Quixote De La Mancha" by Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra!

Don Quixote De La Mancha and his faithful compadre Sancho Panza

My Iranian Don Quixote Theory!

Sometimes, Reza Pahlavi reminds me of Don Quixote on Horse-Back and Dariush Homayoun reminds me of Sancho Panza on the Mule! Praise Allah! The brave Don Quixote often fights the windmills (imaginary Hezbollah) and gains many victories!

L. Reza Pahlavi II Today
The Dodo Bird and his eggplant beak (nose) releasing random frantic rhetorics once a blue moon on TVs, Radios and Web!
R. Reza Pahlavi II in 10 years!
Don Quixote De La Pahlavi battles the mighty Hezbollah and Mullahs (Windmills). Every week he goes in front of the tribune and announces to the Iranians about his future plans to overthrow IRI and free Iran. A legend in his own mind, now residing in Psychiatric Ward, he crowns and thrones himself everyday singing Sorud-e Shahanshahi: Shahanshah-e ma zendeh bada, Iran be farash bovad, javedan, kaz Pahlavi …

You can expand on it and use my system on Jebhe Meli Iran! Amir Entezam can be the Don Quixote, and Dr. Parviz Varjavand (now dead) can be the Sancho Panza! This is a general rule, you can expand it to All Political Groups of Iran! The Whole Iranian Opposition Ego Trip is a Joke and you can elaborate this Law on all of them! The Famous Un-Uniting Opposition of Iran who sacrifices the benefits of Iran for their own Large Egos!

The owners of these pal talk rooms are racing to see who gets to polish Reza Pahlavi's Balls, faster and make it much shinier! They act as little children, racing each other to capture the heart and attention of their parent, in this case Reza Pahlavi! They are still in LaLa Land, dreaming that Reza Pahlavi is the future Shah of Iran, even present Shah of Iran! They call him "Alahazrat Reza Shah-e Dovom" (His Majesty, Reza Shah The 2nd)! These guys have been erecting Shahs for Iran for the last 24 years, they even crowned Reza Pahlavi and throned him in pal talk! These guys give hallucinations and delusions, a new meaning! I beg you to at least drop by these pal talk rooms, once a month for fun and games and check out these opposition pal talk leaders!

Every petty Iranian political group, out of touch with present reality of Iran, has a room in pal talk! Some do not even have a website! Some, just operate their operations from the pal talk room! Check out Monarchists, Tudehis, Fedayee Aksariat, Communists, and of course Jebheis of Pal Talk! I promise you some fine entertainment, guaranteed!

Forum Warriors

Check out Forum Warriors of Iran! The perfect examples are 101 Iranian forums with 101 Dictator Moderator and Monitors who run them and 101 In-tell-egg-chew-all writers who write in them! These guys are as out of touch with today's realities of Iran as Celibate Religious girls in abstinent with the concept of Schlong or Ding Dong!

On these forums, you will find some fine discussions on Persian Language and how we should purify it from Arabic terms, how to pronounce a specific Persian Word correctly, how to create new Persian words and replace the foreign terms with them, creative second hand reported news taken from various news sources and mixed and matched with some special inputs from the poster, a various rhetorics made by different posters of various spectrums, much banging on the head and bashing of one another, praising of each other as In-tell-egg-chew-alls, patting each other on the back or butt, whichever comes first, conducting cyber politico_Erectro_Orgial Sessions between Older Eye-Rainian Political Giants, All Male Parties of Persian Male Chauvinists (Mard Salars), and of course the usual propaganda and screamings of Simple Minds with Simple Pleasures, finding an opportunity to release some Gas or Verbal Diarrhea or both on these forums!

These forums are the Neo Psychological Escapes of Iranians on the net; however, instead of a getaway to Hawaii on the weekend, they getaway to these Bang and Ball Forums and watch our brave Opposition Feeders of 1979 and 2003, put on a show for them and play yet another episode of "Over Throwing the IRI" Forum Series, on the cyber space, for them! Awesome Cyber Orgies, made by Older Iranian Men with too much time on their hands and too big of a mouth to scream and to cover up for the small penises in their trousers! I urge you to drop by and please catch the latest screening, every evening at the nearby theater of Jebhe Meli Forum (The Bright Left Chat and Ball) or Payvand Forum (The Neo Hezbo Chat and Ball) or .......... it's a Gas or at least it will give you some Gas! Do not miss the latest unveiling of the Neo Jebhei God, Doctor Parviz Varjavand, on Jebhe's Bang and Ball Forum (Note that both Jebhe Meli and Payvand Forums are now closed down but I am sure there are many other bull crap Iranian forums for you to cruise by)!

Opposition Leaders

How can you blame the Iranian People in Exile, while you can clearly see that their leaders are deeply in Denial!? Where should we start? Hows about Reza Junior? Yes, Reza Shah-e Dovom, his majesty Reza Shah The 2nd, the Future Shah of Iran, waiting to be crowned and throned for the last 24 years, finally got bored and got erected as the Shah in Exile by his faithful Ball Polishing, Hand Kissing, Ummat of Shahollahi, very similar to Hezbollahi, yet with a blend of Crown instead of a Turban! His Majesty was the Shah first, then he became a semi president, third he expressed himself that he would also accept being the president, if he is asked to, and now he is back on the Kingdom horse via a Democratic Pacifist Seyed Horse of Allah! Praise Allah, also Hassan and Hussein and Hazrat-e Abbas for our future Seyed King, Seyed Reza Pahlavi the Second!

His majesty openly and clearly is under impression that him and his beloved Ummat are slapping the Akhunds and IRI in the face and get Iran closer to the Democracy! He truly believes that the masses of Iran have given him the authority to lead the opposition but he reluctantly rejects to call himself Shah! He will leave that to the ummat to conduct referendum and then erect him as the Shah!

Reza Junior is very good at conducting show interviews of propaganda for a few minutes at a time with FOX and CNN, but he simply refuses to start a down and dirty, hard ball, rough and serious political debate and argument with Dr. X and likes of Dr. X! When it's time to release rhetorics and propaganda and publicity flirtations with American Media, he is right there on the front row, but when it's time to discuss the future of Iran, aside his fantasies and dreams of Shah-hood and Champaign Bubbles, he is no where around! He has no time to deal with the Real Opposition of Iran who runs the show inside and outside Iran, but he has much time to spend with his personal Hand Kissers, Garden Weeds, Testicle Polishers, and Court Jesters in Exile!

Reza Pahlavi is still under the impression that Islamic Republic of Iran is a falling twig and the same as South Africa, it can be brought down with rhetorics on Persian TVs, Video Clips on Website, and sweet words on CNN! He simply does not comprehend that he is dealing with the Nazi Germany and not with a Civilized Regime obedient to the International Law! He sees himself as Gandhi and Iran as British India, moving towards Democracy with sweet words like "Civil Disobedient", "Negative Resistance", "Peaceful Demonstrations", "Non Violence" and "Pacifist Rallies"! When times suits him, then he shows up in front of cameras and sings: "Oh well, I am not saying that it will be specifically, all non violent, and it may be a blend of all struggle types"! Of course he says such words, when he sees that things in Tehran are getting out of hands from time to time, and we agitate the youth and students to commit violence, use fire bombs and cocktail Molotovs! So he takes the upper hand and he sticks to a wide range of struggle forms! Simply amazing tactics, our future King has!

I simply do not want to even elaborate on the rest of our so-called Opposition Leaders! I have talked about the rest, many times before! We (IPC Operations) tried to unite these Ego Bubbles, many times before and we have failed to bring them together. Reza Pahlavi, is the most realistic one, amongst the herd! The rest are deep in LaLa Land! Jebhe Meli, are a bunch of confused misfits still trapped between the traps of Reform or Opposition! They release rthetorics and slogans, without any clear agenda, still waving Mosadeq pictures and still praising their prisoned fossil boys who are still in prison for their crimes against Iran and for creating the Islamic Republic of Iran, and well paid for their services by the Mullahs! Jebhe Meli Iran is the most pathetic and out of touch joke of a political organization still claiming to be the Answer to the problem of Iran!

Then you got Marxist Islamic Brothers and Sisters of Mojahed, disarmed in Iraq and jailed in Paris, still erecting presidency from Paris Jail and sending photos of their erected president, Maryam Rajavi with her Red Islamo_Marxist Lachak via Internet to Iran and claiming victory while there are barely any audience left to cheers for them in Iran! And hey, let's not forget the 101 Iranian Communisto_Socialist Groups and Factions of Factions, the ever-divided leftist parties of Iran! Iranian Leftist Parties are like Embryonic Eggs! They divide as fast as the embryo cells into 1000 pieces! Every time that you see a new Communist Party appearing in Iranian politics, next thing you know, a new faction divides out of it! The best example is the Fedayeen Khalq, who got divided in to 12 groups and parties, yet still on going..........!

Show me two Iranians who can agree on an issue and I show you an Anal virgin in Qom or Qazvin, either way!

The whole story is a joke, the whole political arena of Iran is doomed, the whole atmosphere is poisoned and that is why, except fools and usual cattle, no one sees any salvation to the problem of Iran! The "As Is" situation of Iran will remain "As Is", until we display a clear vision of the "To Be" Situation! No clear view, no hope of salvation, and no solution in the horizon. With opposition leaders and out of touch dreamers like these, I do not see any nearby solution!

People of Iran, specifically in Exile, are so out of touch with reality that you could observe any of these episodes during the last month:

All you had to do was to go to Iranian Public Gatherings in Libraries, Concerts, Meetings, Movies, Poetry Nights, Schools, Political Rallies, Parties and Park Round Ups or Cultural Events and then talk to the masses. Everyone would tell you that we would be in Tehran by end of the year or even month! Some where even planing the transportation method to take them to Iran! They were discussing on how to travel via bus from Turkey to Iran! They had already packed the suitcases for the 100th times since the 1979 Reaction! Travel Groups were formed, suitcases were packed, travel organizations were made, I even heard Stock Market liquidations, Real Estate Sales of Houses and lands were even in process! I am telling you, some were just short of purchasing plane tickets to Tehran!

During the last 24 years, there has never ever been an unrest or riot that occurred in Iran, and against the Islamic Regime, that has been lasted more than 12 days and then these simpletons were once again for the 100th times packing up to land in Tehran and by the end of the month or the year! Their leaders were promising them heaven, their 24 hour Radios and TVs were practically making Revolution in Iran, their Ragazines and Los Angeles Toilet News Papers were Creating an Imaginary Revolutionary Situation for them, their Intellectuals were singing Ey Iran Anthems for them, their Opposition Leaders and Feeders were on FOX and CNN or at least on MSNBC, every day of the week! All and all smelled like the end of IRI! Hell, Islamic Regime was about to go and a Democratic Iran was about to form and all of this was happening on Iranian Media from Ragazines to 24 hour Radios! All of these Iranian Older Men with broken accents and deranged English were showing up in CNN and singing "I'm Going Home" songs on International TVs! What happened?

18 Tir and 9th of July came and riots lasted 1 lousy day, one whole day! The riots that we (The Real Opposition) have planned for 3 weeks, actually lasted for one day! Suddenly all the Iranian Media and Opposition Leaders, shutten the Hell up! All the people turned to stone and someone had dropped a bucket of Ice on the heads of the Iranian Masses! Was this anything new? Hell no! Every year it's the same story, but this year with Iraqi and Afghani situation, everyone thought President Bush would be landing in Mehrabad International Airport by mid July and if not, then for sure Reza Pahlavi would! A Charade, all a large size charade show of lights and sound effects made by Iranian Opposition Leaders and Media and Simpleton Self-Kidding Public in Exile and Wishful Public in Inxile! (Inxile: People in Exile inside Iran and inside their own country!)

You see, I and likes of me, never sweet talk the masses and never give them false hopes. They often call me a pessimist demoralizer but hey, I call it Realism! I been walking this fairy tale for too long and I have memorized the path on this Yellow Brick Road to the LaLa Land of OZ by the heart!

Our dearly beloved intellectuals of Iran are failing to see the reality of Iran! I used to be like that! We are in denial! We refuse to see the fact that majority of our masses are not educated!

Many are schooled, yet only a few are truly educated!

Our masses behave as semi wild cattle in the Wild Wild East! Our Opposition Feeders/Leaders are Riding the Masses in the Wild Wild Eastern Iranian Plateau! I am telling ya, it's like "Riding in Wild Wild East and Fantasies of Iranian Opposition!"

These cattle-like Ummat of Allah are a herd in need of some Father Figure, Vali-ye Faqih, Shah, Dictator, or Guru to lead them as Marja-e Taqlid to the promised land and salvation, also tells them on how to live their lives, go to bathroom or even have sex! These Cattle Herds of Allah are following the Fuhrer blindly to the Slaughterhouse, shall it be The Imam or the Shah! All we can do is to try to educate them and hope that this Father Figure Hee-Row will be a Nationalist Kind verses a Blood Sucking Leech of a Dictator like Ayatollahs of Qom! That's all! We need to educate these masses, so they will not remain, in need of a Hee-Row!

An Interesting Case

Go to Amjadiyeh Soccer Stadium or Aryamehr 100,000 Capacity Soccer Stadium (whatever Islamically correct names like Shirudi or KIR Doodi, they may have now!), any day of the week, and observe the savage masses like cattle, rush the fences and the field to cuss the hell out of the referee and players and rush the grounds to beat them up! These sweet words such as:

Davar, Kos-e Nanat
(Referee, F..... your mother)

are norm of Iranian's sports scene! Suddenly a Security, a Policeman, a Gendarme will show up and pop out every few yards from each other and all around the stadiums with batons or Chomaqs (Islamic Batons) in their hands! As soon as the Gendarme, waves the baton and authority stick in the air and shouts at them, suddenly the whole cattle-like herd of Allah, in human waves, will go back, but as soon as the Gendarme goes to the other side, the human wave of cattle, will approach the fence and the field to attack the referee and players of the opposing team, either orally or physically! Then the Gendarme comes back and waves the Chomaq in the air and beats up a few Gav O Olaq Cattle on the head, and then again the Herd of Allah moves on backward away from the fences!

It's like a magnetic field created by a magnet and the movement of Iron Shreds back and forth towards the magnet! Gendarme shouts Hoshhhhhhhhhh, Herrrrrrrri, Horrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr (Sounds to tame the cattle) and waves the baton stick, then suddenly the cattle pulls back (Cattle respects and fears power)! Gendarme moves away to tame the other side of the stadium and on this side, the cattle pushes forward again in cattle waves! No concept of manners, creating a line, organization, etiquette nor civilization! Cattle pushes forward to break the fence and roams the field sounding like "Moooooooooooooooooooooo"! This is the reality of Iran! The reality of Iran, are not a few intellectuals, educated members of IPC or other groups, our student members inside major universities of Iran, or a few dozen of our commands around the major Iranian cities whom I do conduct Video Net Meetings or Voice Chats with them! The harsh reality of Iran are our Cattle of Allah, Pushing to break the fence, if not a Gendarme present to wave the baton at them! Cattle needs a Cowboy, Cattle cannot create a Democratic System!

A Statistical Comparison

Think about it, let me do a Statistical Comparison:

Sports Fan in Iranian Soccer Stadiums are a sample statistics of the Iranian society in General!
Majority of our masses are not Civilized Persians, they are Barbarian Herds of Allah!
Masses of Cattle, needs Cattle Ranchers, to hit and direct them to order!
Cattle needs order!

Now, let me compare The 2 Societies:

Wild Wild West and Wild Wild East!

Compare The Wild Wild West (America 19th Century West) to The Wild Wild East (Iran 21st Century Today)!

West had American Cattle sounding: Mooooooooooooo,
East has Muslim Cattle sounding: Mooooooooslim, Mooslim, Muslim!

West had American Big Ol Cows, Buffaloes and Wild Bulls,
East has Eye-Rainian Allah praying Gav (Cow), Gusaleh (Calf), Guspand (Sheep), Babaii (Lamb) and Olaq (Donkey)!

West had Tough and wild Cattle to tame,
East has Chamush (savage) Allahic beasts to control and direct!

West had Cowboys to tame the Cattle,
East has Mullahs to lead the Ummat!

West had Cowboys wearing Cowboy Hats and Sombreros to ride horses,
East has Ayatollahs wearing Turbans and Hezbollah wearing Head Bands to tame the Muslim Herd!

Western Cowboys ride horses,
Eastern Turbanboys ride the Muslim Gusaleh and Guspand!

Western Cows scream: Mooooooooooooo
Eastern Cattle screams: Mooooooooooooo, Ba-aa-aa-aaaaa, or Arrrrrrrr Arrrrrrrr Arrrrrrr, .......

Western Donkeys go: Hee Haw, Eeeh Haw, Hee .............
Eastern Pure Persian Donkeys go: Arrrrrrrrrr Arrrrrrr Arrrrrrrrrrrrrr, Arneh!

Western Cattle Rancher rides the Western Cattle,
Eastern Ayatollahs, Velayat-e Faqih, Spiritual Leaders, ride the Muslim Shiite Iranian Cattle!

Western Main Attraction is the Indian White Buffalo,
Eastern Main Attraction is the Tall long eared Persian Pure Breed Donkeys!

Westerners sometimes import foreign Cattle from Argentina or Australia,
Eastern Iranians are self-sufficient, we have plenty of Gav O Olaq internally, no need to import from Cyprus (Qebres)!

Western Cowboys tame the cattle with ropes and whips,
Eastern Hezbos tame the cattle with Chomaq (Islamic Baton)!

Western Cowboys brand the cattle with Flaming Hot Iron Brand,
Eastern Mullahs brand the cattle with Allah Brand inside their brains via brainwash!

Western Cattle eats lots of fresh grass
Eastern Cattle eats lots of Free Qeyme Polo at the Mosque, after Ashura Chest Banging Rallies!

Western Cattle is pure Dumb, reads no books,
Eastern Cattle however, reads a few pages of Quran in broken Arabic!

Western Cattle can be heard late at night moaning MMMMmmmmmoooooooooooooooo,
Eastern Cattle can be heard late at night sounding Allah O Akbar!

Western Big Rancher orders/organizes the cattle via cowboys and horses,
Eastern Ayatollahs order/organize the cattle via Quran, Sword and Chomaq, whichever comes first!

Western Cowboys ride the horses to round up the cattle,
Eastern Turbanboys ride the Donkeys and the cattle has already rounded up via the Quran!

Western Cowboys train cattle to use them for food, milk and hide,
Eastern Turbanboys train cattle to use them for labor, absolute obedient and sometimes to make Islamic Revolutions!

Western Cattle lives in the ranch,
Eastern Cattle lives in cities or Villages!

Western cattle roams around prairies and eats grass,
Eastern Cattle roams around Mosques and eats Halva (Persian Delicacy)!

Western Cattle looks into Cowboys' hands to whip them into obedient,
Eastern Cattle looks into Velayat's Book of Tozihol Masael to direct their lives!

Western Cattle needs the Cowboy to lead and direct them,
Eastern Cattle, needs Imam to lead their lives and teach them how to live!

Western Cattle has short ears and fat bellies, but mumbles and hums a lot,
Eastern Cattle has long ears, sharp horns and rants a few statements in Arabic!

Western Cattle has a Supreme Cattle Rancher,
Eastern Cattle has a Supreme Spiritual Leader or Velayat-e Faqih!

Western Cattle has no belief,
Eastern Cattle are often Shiite or at least Muslim!

Western Cattle assembles in the ranch,
Eastern Cattle assembles in Jum'a at the Mosque!

Western Cattle are Prime Grade A Steaks,
Eastern Cattle are Pure Shiite in body and minds!

Western Male Bull is large and has horns,
Eastern Male Bull is unshaved and wears black!

Western Female Cow has breasts and has black and white colors of skin,
Eastern Female Cow wears Lachak or other Rags as Hejab or Chador!

Western Cattle has many young Energetic Calves,
Eastern Herd has much "Mache Olaq" (Wild Young Donkeys) throwing back kicks and Joftak Chahar Gush!

Western Cowboys are Master Ranchers,
Eastern Turbanboys are Master Preachers!

Western Cowboys Ride Them Bulls in Rodeos,
Eastern Turbanboys Ride Them Muslim every day of the year and right in the streets!

Western Cattle celebrates a green fresh grass day at the fields,
Eastern Cattle celebrates Ashura and Tasua!

Western Cattle praise to the Grass God,
Eastern Cattle reads Namaz (Salath) 3 to 5 times a day, depending on Shiite or Sunni!

On, goes the comparison...................

Do you know the origins of the term Muslim? No?
Let me tell ya all about it!
One day Mohammed was passing by near Kabbah and saw a group of Cattle MooMoos were communicating with each other and sounding like: Mooooooooo, Moooooooo, Moo, .......
Then the bright man that Mohammed was, he started to repeat that sound:
Mooooooo, Moo, Mooslem, Muslim! (bright lights)
A halo began to form around Mohammed's head and the light bulbs began to shine, fire works started to light, sound and celebrations began! Yes, Mohammed discovered a name for his ummat!
The Term "Muslim" has formed, and next you know, Islam was born!
And as you can see, until this day, if you travel to Middle East, even in depth of Middle Estern Bazaars, you cannot help it but to hear some Muslim go: "Moooooooooooooooo, Mooooooo, Moo?!"
They are all Moomoos of Allah, all born equal, all MooMoos are equal and brotherly loved!
Small moomoos and large MooMoos, all were born equal and equal in eyes of Islam!
Allah cherishes all MooMoos!
Mooooooooooooooooooooooo (translation in Arabic: Praise Allah)!
And that is how MooMooic Language was born and became a sub branch of the Hemitic Arabic Lingo!
MooMoos often are passionate Cattle of Allah and in need of only one book and that is Quran!
And that is how a young Healthy Calf of Allah sounds like:
Moooooooooooooooooooooooo (Loud Anxious Calf Sound!)

That was A bit of Religious History for you!

And before that, there was the comparison between the 19th Century Wild Wild West and the 21sth Century Wild Wild East!

Ride them Cowboy, Hee Haw, Ride em in, roll em out, whip it in, ride em all, Raw Hide, Raw Hiiiiiiiiiiiiide.....

Ride em out Raw Hide!

Yea, certain cattle are meant to give rides, either to Seyed Imams or Seyed Shahs!
Whip it good, roll em in, row em up, ride em all, roll em all,

Ride them all, Raw Hide!

Praise Allah!
Allah is Merciful and he will always provide us with the Cattle to ride!

And this was our story of the,

Riding in Wild Wild East and Fantasies of Iranian Opposition!

Don Quixote De La Mancha and his faithful compadre Sancho Panza

Amen

Ahreeman Bless

In hope of the better days,

Sign,
An Ex Opposition
and
A Present Miss-Positioned!

Dr. X