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Only in Iran - Part 11
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Only in Iran
Those Funny Crazy Persians: Part 11


Only in Iran
Those Funny Crazy Persians: Part 11
Ahreeman X
July 28, 2012

Funny Iranian Toilet Sign for Men, Women and Transsexuals
Historically, by the orders of Imam Khomeini, the founder of IRI, Sex Operations for Transsexuals become Halaal (recommended) in Islam; therefore, he drafted the Iranian hospitals and clinics nationwide to do the most economic sex change operations in the world. As long as Homosexuality is Haraam (forbidden), then all gays are encouraged to get sex change and transform themselves from homosexuals, transvestites and transsexuals to women. Even though Islam is theoretically Anti Gay, yet most Mullahs, clerics and Tolab (Religious Study Students) are flaming faggots and masters of Lavat (Islamic Anal Sex) in nature. Kun Kunak (Islamic Butt Bangarooni) is Haraam on the book but openly practiced in the hierarchy of the Mosques!
Imam’s Boy Toy
Imam Khomeini himself was very keen on Transvestites and Transsexuals and strongly encouraged them to do sex operations. Today’s IRI Supreme Spiritual Leader (Imam Khamenei) was Imam Khomeini’s Boy Toy and he grown up between Imam’s legs! Young Seyed Ali Khamenei was raised on Imam’s belly and under belly! In fact the young Seyed Ali was raised on Imam’s Bread and Holy Water (Ab-e Yazaj Mazaj-e Imam)! Due to Imam’s order, Iran has become Transsexual Heaven and until this day, Transsexuals from not just Iran but from around the world rush to Iran to get economic sex change operations (cheapest in the world).  After all, Mullahs have turned Iran in to a global center for their Islamic Butt Bangarooni, Butt Exchange and Halaal Lavat! To be fair, Islam is all about Belly, Under the Belly and in Mullahs’ case also about Lavat (Islamic Anal Sex)! What a great religion!
Story of the Sign
IRI is so keen on Transsexuals, so why not make some official toilet signs and include them (I told myself)? A while back, I created this sign, e-mailed it to Iran and a funny kooky member of IPC Operations and student movement in Bandar Anzali (Port Pahlavi) on the Caspian Sea shores, made some nice and realistic life size printer copies of it (on cardboard). He installed them at various public restrooms such as Parks, Boardwalk, Boulevard and Seashores. The signs were amazingly up for quite a while until some Navy MP Sailors had finally caught up with them, informed the park authorities and police and then brought them down. For a long time the local people and the tourists actually thought the signs were official while IPC Ops and Student Movement were cracking up in hiding until the authorities finally caught up with the prank!

Funny Iranian Mosque Sign for Men and Women’s Segregated Namaz Prayer
Actual sign posted to inform the Muslims that Namaz is conducted in segregation and separate halls.

Iranian Women Basketball Team and American Cheerleaders
During the International Competition
L to R:
Zeynab: I wish I could wear them miniskirts!
Ozra: This cheerleader got firm thighs; I love to get between them juicy white American legs!
Kobra: Vah vah these bitches have no shame, look at the way they shake their butts!

Chelo Kabob eating Persian Girl
Bache Napoki! Ajab bache-ye chaqaluyi!
Listen girl, eat single files and chew each bite. Don’t swallow double chunks (Do Lopi Nakhor)!
I know Persian Kabob is the best, but for God’s sake don’t choke on it!

Persian Kabob Kubideh with Charbroiled Tomato, onions and Lavash Bread
Akh Joon, I’m drooling! Now that’s what I call food!
This is why people from around the world drool over Persian food!

For some bizarre reason the conversation with Persians always ends up to food!

Persian Del O Jigar O Qolve O Donbalan Kabob of Lamb Heart, Liver, Kidney and Testicle
Akh Del O Jigareto Beram! Jigareto Bokhoram!
Hey hey not to worry, it’s not Imam’s Donbalan (Testicles), its lamb’s!
That’s natural aphrodisiac and works 10 times better than Viagra! Rock hard baby!

Sarlashkar Firouzabadi Iranian General of IRGC
And this is what will happen to you when eating delicious Persian food everyday!
Send the General to the boot camp to drop some weight!

Iranian Student Kabob Grill, Dormitory Style!
And when you are away from your town studying in some Tehran University and living in the dorm, not to worry, you can always use your Persian ingenuity and creativity to come up with some homemade grill like this one! Just don’t burn down the dorm room or crack the tiles!

Iranian Butcher’s Love Letter: I Love You

Iranian can’t fit in the truck’s cargo compartment!
Akbar (Driver): Hey I have to get maximum sufficiency from all seats and as my assistant you have to ride in the cargo compartment, so don’t stuff yourself with too much Persian food. Fat ass won’t fit!

Funny Iranian’s (Kurdish Hassan) Overloaded Broken Truck
Hassan Kord-e: Khak bar saram shod! I didn’t load that much in the truck, so why it broke in half?!

Funny Iranian Samand Ambulance
What the hell is this? And how the hell do you get the patients up there from the back?
I guess they cut a one piece long back door!

Funny Parking Problem in Tehran Traffic Zoo of Iran
Oh yes, I forgot to tell you that we do have a parking problem in Tehran!

Paykan Limousine? What a costume made stretch job! Jalal Khaleq! Ajaba? Heyrata!

Funny Iranian Hot Biker Chick Pirate
Please meet Gypsy Zahra, one tough Persian Biker Chick! Zahra is such professional rider that she doesn’t need boots but she wears Naleyn Sandals!

Funny Iranian Bikers!
Ahreeman Joon: Excuse me boys, are you guys biking or butt banging each other?!

Funny Iranian Old Zhian Citroen Car Security!
Ahreeman Joon: Khak bar saret! Do you really think that someone would actually steal this piece O Shiite that you had to chain it to the tree? The price of chain is higher than the Zhian!

Delivery, Persian Style!
Funny Iranian biker and overload traffic violation in front of a police! The guy riding at the back looks directly at the police while clearly at violation but does he care? Does the police care?!
Welcome to Tehran Traffic Zoo!

Funny Iranian Traffic Sign
I am confused set aside this guy! What the hell is that? Don’t enter or one way? Sing along:
“Should I stay or should I go now?
If I’ll stay would be there trouble?
Lala La Lala La Lala …”

Remember that one by The Clash?

Funny Iranian Freeway Sign
Welcome to F..K, Iran! 5 Kilometer to F..K! Enjoy the F..K! Or enjoy getting F..Ked at F..K!

Funny Iranian Public Toilets for the Ladies, Gentlemen and then the Public!
Doors L to R: Public, Gentlemen, Ladies! So I guess Transsexuals can go to the first door (Public)!

Funny Iranians are not big on children safety!
Children’s safety is overrated around the world; you must do it the Persian Style!

Funny Iranian Sheep Bath!
What the hell are these guys doing? Are they shepherds? Or is it shower before bestiality?

Funny Iranian toilet pitcher (Aftabeh) lock!
Question: Is it really necessary to lock it?
Answer: In Iran, hell yes!

Funny Iranian False Advertising Panda Ice Cream Bar
This is what you buy (left), but this is what you get (right)! Bull Shiite Persian Style!

Funny Iranian Escalator to Nowhere!
Forget the bridge to nowhere in America but check out the escalator to nowhere, Persian Style!
A project never finished? A storage area for the escalator? Allah only knows!
Another half ass, half made project well done, Persian Style!

Funny Iranian Stairways to Nowhere!
Question: Where would you use this stairway?
Answer: The same place that you use the above escalator!

Funny Iranian Wanna Be Hackers of the “First Move” Movie
Yes, this is yet another Bull Shiite Scene from yet another Bull Shiite Hollywood Replica Action Pact Persian made movie from Tehran-wood!
But of course Ershad (Ministry of Islamic Propaganda) oversaw the movie before screening and even made the male actor to cover his hair! Why? Who knows! Maybe he is gay or Trans!
Hey don’t ask too many questions because things don’t have to make sense in Iran!

Funny Iranian Anti Computer Monitor Ray Glasses for Super Fast Internet
Please pay attention that these are specifically for High Speed Internet, not dial-ups!
Bull Shiite advertising, Persian Style?! You got it baby!

Funny Iranian Basij Paramilitia Mullah (right) and Beanie Hatter Villager (left)
These village idiots are the modern commanders of the modern Iran’s Paramilitia!
Please compare them with the professional clean cut Imperial Generals of the pre 1979 Islamic Iran!

Funny Iranian Banner: AIDS victims’ blood is dedicated to Imam!
Slogan: “The blood in our veins, is a present for our Imam.”
Sign: Assembly of the AIDS Patients

Gay Latino fans of Ahmadinejad rally in solidarity with the Iranian president!
Ahmadinejad: “By your western definition, we have no gays in Iran.”
Ahreeman Joon: There may be no Gays in Iran but the Gay Latinos do support Ahmadinejad!

Funny Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad
Ahmadinejad: What? You want me and this old guy to go down in the basement and wait for you? OK Big Javad (Javad Kolofteh)!

“A Funny Mahmoud Ahmadinejad and Robert Mugabe Incident had occurred at the airport!” (Media)
Ahmadinejad: Is it true what they say about the Black Guys?
Mugabe: Oh don’t be so modest, you Persian guys are pretty passionate yourselves!

Ahmadinejad: Ohoy boy, bring another round of chai tea for the elders … Ahay bache chai biyar vase bozorgtar …

Ahmadinejad pooped on!
Ahreeman Joon: Good Dog … Good doggie Shiite all over Haji’s face!

Maryam Rajavi’s wedding without scarf lachak!
Ahreeman Joon: It is amazing how Maryam Rajavi did not wear the Islamic hejab on her hair for her wedding but now she wears it to politically pander to her brain dead Muslim followers amongst the Mojahedin (PMOI)! But on the bright side, I love her colorful lachaks!
Maryam Rajavi: Ahreeman don’t be so cruel, I know you have a thing for me!
Massoud Rajavi: Ahreeman you son of a bitch, stop flirting with my wife.
Ahreeman Joon: Massoud jan, Why so serious at the wedding? Don’t worry it is Halaal (Islamically Recommended) for the “Marxist Islamists” to share everything including wives! Ahreeman is not Na-Mahram (stranger), we’re all comrades, let’s share … give it a chance Massoud! Aren’t you guys moving from “Armed Struggle” to “Political Struggle”? Then “No War, Make Love”! Let’s all make love!

Funny Iranian Girl wearing proper Islamic Hejab, Persian Style!
Ahreeman Joon: Who said Islamic Hejab is bounding the women?! Actually I find it pretty much liberating! For instance, look at the beautiful lachak on Fatimah’s head and how well she covers her hair and neck! But then again Fatimah lets it all hang out below the neck! This is the type of Islamic Hejab I love! Very traditional yet progressive! I love them beefy thighs thus my ancestors (Qajars) were butchers!

Iranian Transsexual Sisi in Red Light
Ahreeman Joon: Akh joon Sisi Joon, to che labat koloft shode! Your lips have become like Angelina Jolie, have you done some Botox?

Iranian Transsexual Sisi got Persian rug burns!
Ahreeman Joon: Sisi joon, what are you doing on the Persian rug? Don’t get Persian Rug Burns on your knees, rubbing back and forth doing the nasty! Now that’s what I call a good “Chick with Dick” AKA “Chick-fil-A”!

“Wrestlers in the Iranian Greco-Roman wrestling tournament were engaging passionately!” (Media)
Taqi (red): Oh God help me to control myself not to bang this boy! His posture is such a Tahrik Konande (turn on)! I’m not gay but this boy’s posture and position made me so Hashari (horny) that I got a woody and I must stick it somewhere! 
Naqi (blue): Baba either make a wrestling move or a sexual move cause I can’t wait in this position forever!

Funny Iranian torn pants crotch during Muslim Namaz Prayer
Abbas: Ya Allah, baba I ran around after a daily piece of bread in this God forsaken country for so long that my pants ripped and now my crotch and under shorts are showing during Namaz! God just come down from the skies and bang me up the Shiiter and allow me to resign from this religion so I don’t have to bend over up and down 3 times a day and reciting this Kos O Sher called Namaz!

Iranian Gay Pop Stars Kamran and Hooman AKA Gayron and Gayman with their Sugar Daddy
Sugar Daddy (middle): I bang these two Bache Kunis (Boy Toys) and facilitate + expand both their careers and bung holes. They call me the Master Rimmer! I play with their shambools and I bang them silly across their butts and heads!!
Gayron (Kamran) and Gayman (Hooman): We’re with Big Daddyo! Eva Bala …
Sugar Daddy: Who your daddy bitches?
Gayron (Kamran) and Gayman (Hooman): You Big Daddyo, you…

Iranian Gay Bodybuilder Strongman “Akbar Mahiche” the Muscle-man
Akbar Mahiche (Muscle): I’m a Persian Hairy Bear. They call me Akbar Mahiche cause I’m very Koloft (thick) and my Mahiche is also very koloft! I’m also looking for these two little faggots Gayron (Kamran) and Gayman (Hooman). I want to land the sword of Islam hard and deep sheer in to their taboulis until they scream Ya Allah and convert to Islam!  I wanna bang them hard and make them humble! I wanna rip them to shreds to make their heads spin like Linda Blair in Exorcist!  I wanna bang them on the heads with my Mahiche so they can see the light of Muhammad …. You get the picture! I’m after them and I wanna take them back to Qom and make good Muslim boys out of them (Ab-e Towbe berizam sareshun)! So has anyone seen them around? Anyone at all? Anybody?

Funny Iranian creative economic Qalyan Hookah Smoker
Qazanfar Shireyi: I’m Qazanfar Shireyi (junkie). Once upon a time when I was young, I also had Mahiche and it was very Koloft! I also was a strongman and a big shot “Butt Banger”! Yes, once upon a time I used to bang a dozen of boy toys like Gayron (Kamran) and Gayman (Hooman). “Are Haji Dud az Kondeh boland mishe” (smoke rises from the old log)! But now in the autumn of my life I have to come up with silly ideas for cheap Qalyan (Hookah), set a begging pan and to attract and amuse the public for a dime or a nickel! Yes, once upon a youth I was a Pahlevan Strongman but now I peddle my ass for a few dollars more! By the way, anybody has seen Gayron (Kamran) and Gayman (Hooman)? I’m too old to cut the mustard but I can still leak the jar! I’ll rim them Bache Kunis and do Laval Halaal (Islamic Anal Sex)! Lavat lazem shod!

Only in Iran baby, only in Iran. To be continued ……

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